Ask Her: All Eyes on Me

two people sitting on stairs looking at a laptop Photo by Charlotte May from Pexels

Dear Her: I need help with being the one that everyone comes to with their problems.

Sincerely,  Tied Down in Tie Dye

Dear Tied Down in Tie Dye: It is amazing that all of your friends know they can count on you, but it can be very draining always working through other people’s problems. I know that I have been this person. It took me a long time to realize that if I am not taking care of myself first, I can’t take care of others. It is important to set boundaries and be able to tell your friends when you can’t listen to them. A simple conversation about when you can be available will help set some guidelines. Prioritize yourself while also being there for your friends as much as you can. This does not make you a bad friend; it makes you an even better one because now when your friends talk to you about their problems you are more emotionally available to help them.

HCXO, Her

Courtesy of Bumble

Dear Her: I am currently on dating apps and whenever I go out in public I feel like all eyes are staring. I have this fear, as irrational as it may be, that people around me have seen me on those apps. I am scared that people who I have not matched with or unmatched with are around thinking bad things about me. Am I overthinking things?

Sincerely,  Overthinker

Dear Overthinker: If you want to be on dating apps right now, don’t let people’s gaze stop you from finding that perfect partner. You are strong, beautiful, and kind. If you unmatched with someone, I am sure you have your reasons, and you have to stay true to your decisions. To be completely honest, people probably don’t even notice. The number of people that people talk to on dating apps makes it difficult to remember every face. Keep doing you, and don’t be afraid to continue being your beautiful self!

HCXO, Her

Ask Her is Her Campus at American’s advice column. If you would like to receive advice, please submit a form here and look out for a response in a future article!

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