This Zoo Will Name a Cockroach After Your Ex on Valentine’s Day

Who needs a box of chocolates or a dozen roses for Valentine’s Day, when you can gift yourself a cockroach instead. No, really. The El Paso Zoo in Texas will name a cockroach after your ex and then feed it to a meerkat on February 14. But wait, there’s more—the zoo will do all of this live on camera, for your viewing pleasure.

Sarah Borrego, the zoo’s event coordinator, told CBS news, “this is a fun way to get the community involved in our daily enrichment activities.” I can’t argue that. To name your cockroach—try not to laugh when imagining a bunch of roaches with human names—you can message the zoo on Facebook. Then, on Valentine’s Day, they’ll live-stream a “Quit Bugging Me” meerkat event. “The meerkats love to get cockroaches as a snack and what better way to celebrate Valentine’s Day than by feeding them a cockroach named after your ex,” said Borrego. I can’t think of any other way to celebrate, really. Message your ex's name to the zoo here and, uh, Happy Valentine's Day!