How to Deal with Spending Summer Apart from Your Best Friend

Ah, it’s finally summer, basically the most freeing time of the year. With no more finals or homework to worry about, you can finally look forward to bathing in the sun, going on road trips, and having some valuable TLC. Except, there’s a catch — this summer, your best friend might not be with you. Whether you’re leaving your college besties in a different city or state, we can all agree that being without them is no fun. 

As someone who has literally all of her best friends living in different states, I know how difficult it can be to figure out what to do with your life when you can’t hit up your friend group for a random lunch date. Being without your best pals can spark a lot of loneliness and boredom, and it may also lead you to worry about the possibility of the friendship fading away until the semester starts again.

Since I’ve been able to successfully spend many summers without my best friends (and still have strong friendships with them), here are some survival tips I’ve learned over the years.

Related: How to Deal When Your Best Friend Becomes Distant 

1. Communication is key

When you have good communication, you don’t have to worry about losing the friendship over the time that you are apart from each other. An easy way to keep up the momentum is texting or FaceTiming each other regularly. Even if you don’t have much time on your hands, it’s still important to make sure to send the occasional “Miss you so much, hope you’re doing well!” text to let them know you’re thinking of them. 

You can also use social media to stay connected while you’re away from each other. A way that my best friend and I use social media to our advantage is by DM’ing each other hilarious memes we see on Twitter or Instagram. This way we are constantly laughing with each other without physically being with each other. Certain posts will also spark conversations between us because of how relatable they are. Ah, the power of memes.

 
 
 
 

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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2. Make plans with each other

You know how setting goals keeps you motivated in the process of achieving them? Use that same concept when it comes to friendships. Making future plans with your friend will give you something to look forward to, and ultimately make your connection even stronger. For example, you can make plans to visit each other over summer, and talk about transportation, dates, and things to do together. If it’s your friend from college, you can talk about all the fun activities to look forward to once the fall semester starts up again. 

This summer, I’m planning on travelling across the country to visit my best friend. The plans have us so excited that we’ve already bought concert tickets together, made a list of things to see and places to eat, and have even started discussing potential Insta-worthy captions. Making plans lifts our moods from loneliness to excitement, and it has truly made our friendship stronger!

3. Widen your social circle

Of course, no one can replace your best friend, but it doesn’t hurt to widen your circle and befriend more people. Find some other students to do summer activities with so that you can enjoy yourself! If you’re antisocial like me (lol), I would recommend starting off by making small talk with anyone you come across! Anything from complimenting someone’s outfit in an elevator, or asking about someone’s drink at a local cafe, can lead to a potential friendship. Making connections, however uncomfortable they might feel at first, is way better than being lonely for three months, trust me. 

4. Spend time with family

Another activity I recommend would be to spend time with family over summer. They’ll love it, especially if you were away for college throughout the year. I always like to go shopping with my mom, or watch movies with my sister. Catch them up on your stories from college, and enjoy the time you have in the comfort zone you grew up in. 

5. Catch up with old friends

Since you’re back in your hometown, it might feel nice to hit up some people you grew up with, or went to high school with. Grab lunch and reminisce about memories you made growing up, or discuss what’s new in your life. Being in your hometown often comes with feelings of nostalgia, so try to meet up with those who have played a huge role in your life when you lived there!

6. Keep yourself busy 

Since summer is the one time of the year where you don’t have a full calendar of classes, make the most of it! Pick up activities that you won’t mind doing alone. For example, applying to jobs and internships is a way to make sure you’re always doing something productive. Plus, you would be making extra money (which you could potentially save up to visit your best friend, hint hint). 

You can also pick up hobbies, like trying a new sport. Starting a reading list is always a nice way to occupy yourself as well. For me, I find it useful when I do self-care, such as going to the gym. I’ve found it to be something very therapeutic and a good way to kill a couple hours.  

I know that being without your best friend can be very difficult, especially when it’s summer and you have a ton of time on your hands. If you just focus on maintaining the friendship and keeping yourself busy, I promise those feelings of loneliness will go away! After all, distance does make the heart fonder.

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