How To Make & Keep Friendships As An Adult

This article has been syndicated from Figuring out My Ever After, an InfluenceHer Collective Member. Read the full post here.

If you’ve made it to adulthood, chances are you’ve had to take a Myer’s Brigg Personality Test. My personality type is INFJ meaning I’m an introvert, intuitive, feeling and judging. With that being said as an introvert and with a touch of social anxiety it can be hard to really push myself to get out there and engage with others. If it isn’t that then a busy schedule inhibits any type of socializing I would like to do. So how do I keep my friends while trying to #adult?

This past Sunday I headed up to upstate New York with a few friends to pick some apples, drink some wine and cider and enjoy the outdoors. While autumn may have arrived, so did a heat wave and it was BEYOND scorching hot outside. That didn’t stop us from enjoying the orchard though.

So what does this have to do with keeping friends?

Schedule Out Dates

As you get older, responsibilities tend to pile up and one day leads into the next. It’s easy for months to go by without seeing anyone aside from your coworkers, partner and family members. I know that once I graduated from school I kind of fell off of the wagon and didn’t hang out with anyone. I was getting invited to things, I just wasn’t managing my time well enough to really make it out to events. By scheduling it the way I schedule my other obligations and appointments it felt like more of an official comittment than something I can brush to the side. Put it in your Google calendar. Whatever it is that keeps you accountable, use it.

Keep Up to (Skype) Date

So let’s say you can’t see each other weekly, that doesn’t mean that you can’t “see”  each other. Skyping totally counts as hanging out with each other in my humble opinion. Let’s be real we have to multi-task sometimes and do the laundry, meal prep for the week and get our girl talk in. I wouldn’t rely heavily on this but Skype, FaceTime and Snapchat have helped me feel close to those I haven’t seen in awhile.

Quality over Quantity

Let’s face it, it isn’t high school or college where you’re a dorm or short bike ride away. Chances are you and your friend group have moved on to different cities, states or even countries. So instead of trying to squeeze in many short lunches or dinners. Try to make it a block of time that really allows you to take a breath and reconnect. Mark off a whole day or afternoon. There’s only so much you can say over brunch, but a couch session? Man, that is priceless.

Read the full post here