I guess we really can’t have nice things now, huh? We can’t just have donuts delivered to us without there being some terrifying aspect, right? October is one of the best months, filled with candy, bright leaf colors and costume parties, but it also stands to be the one that puts everyone on constant edge. Wonder why? Maybe it’s because we have places like Hurts Donuts which lets people hire a clown to deliver donuts to those they wish to terrorize. This could be fun.
Hurts Donuts opened its first shop in Springfield, Missouri in 2013. 5 years later they are truly making their mark. Their website advertises themselves as the “rebel of all donuts.” The donuts made there are truly bizarre and creative. Some of the flavors include cotton candy, andes mint, s’mores and maple bacon. Each month they introduce even more out-there concoctions which mesmerize all donut lovers.
Image via Hurts Donuts
Now, you can get a box of these delicacies at the hand of a spine-chilling clown. If you’re looking to hire this menacing delivery guy for your special someone, look through the Facebook pages of their 19 shops. The stores can only be found in Missouri, Colorado, Wisconsin, Arizona, Oklahoma, Texas, Kansas, Nebraska, Iowa and Arkansas.
You have to do a little digging to find the times and locations available for this friendly guy. Some areas have one specific day, while in Springfield the clown is accessible Monday-Friday for all of October. How kind of them.
According to Bustle, the cost to send your friends back to their childhood nightmares is only $5 (plus the cost of the donuts)! What a steal.
I truly thought we had moved past this frenzy after the Clown Panic of 2016. I would go as far to call it the Clown Epidemic of 2016. Those videos were down right paralyzing to watch. However, the use of clowns to keep people in line will never go away I guess.
So, if you want to avoid this surprise visitor, may I suggest telling every single frenemy and friend you have that you are either allergic to donuts or despise them. I hope you will all be spared. Stay alert my friends.