Halloween is terrifying

Halloween is scary. I have always been afraid of the dark and of the show Are You Afraid of the Dark? and of movies where things pop out. I still have to leap into bed because of Mischa Barton sticking out her hand and grabbing that kid's ankle in The Sixth Sense. Who's afraid of Mischa Barton? Yeah, I am. But it turns out nothing is more terrifying than the college revelry that takes place on the Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, AND Sunday surrounding Halloween. First of all, that means a scary number of activities that must be attended, requiring a ghoulish volume of energy drinks to power through. I don't know what Guarana is exactly, but it's my new best friend. And then there's the fact that my diet, which formerly consisted of bagels and tap water, now is made up of 9000 calories worth of miniature candy bars consumed hourly. Scurvy is something we should all be spooked by. And then the creepiest of all: Last night I was swung around (in the spirit of Halloween!) over someone's head and thrown into a brick wall. Concussions are pretty haunting. So I'm off to ice my wounds with cans of Starbucks doubleshot Energy+Coffee drinks until the next round of terror. Keep your feet away from the edge of the bed, and your vitamin C pills close at hand, and maybe we can survive together. If I don't make it, please do not bury me in my Eloise costume.