1. “I’ll start going to the gym tomorrow.”
You tell yourself everyday you’ll go to the gym tomorrow. Let’s be honest. You never make it to the gym.
2. “One more episode.”
It’s 2 a.m. and you have a 8 a.m. class, but your show on Netflix just ended in a cliffhanger.
3. “My hair isn’t that greasy.”
Dry shampoo is our hero and our enemy.
4. “I’ll be fine just looking over the notes.”
You brilliantly convince yourself that you don’t need to actually study for the exam. Looking over your 20 pages of notes 15 minutes before the exam is enough to get you an A. It usually isn’t.
5. “No one will notice I wore this yesterday.”
Someone will probably notice, but you’re going to do it anyway.
6. “Just five more minutes.”
When you’re setting your alarm, you’re always way to ambitious. Those five extra minutes of sleep are really going to make a huge difference.
7. “I’ll only have one drink.”
We all know how this normally turns out.
8. “I’ll be able to wake up for this 8:00 a.m. class.”
You may actually get yourself to class, but you’re trying not to fall asleep the whole time.
9. “He’s a nice guy.”
If you have to try and convince your friends and family that he’s a nice guy, he’s probably not a nice guy.
10. “It’s not that cold outside.”
Just bring the jacket, so you don’t have to pretend you’re not cold the whole night so you don’t have to listen to your friends say “I told you so.”
11. “I’m starting my diet today.”
Usually you say this to yourself after eating a dozen Insomnia cookies by yourself, but let’s be real, you can’t only eat one.
12. “I’m only here for laundry detergent.”
You walk into Target with one thing on your list. You walk out of Target with a new yoga mat, some shoes, a toaster, a face mask, two decorative pillows, a candle, some magazines, mascara, a notebook but no laundry detergent.
13. “It’s a great idea to rewatch this series.”
You have two papers, a discussion post and an online quiz, but the best thing to do with your time is rewatch Gossip Girl for the fourth time.
14. “I can go another day without doing laundry.”
You’ve been wearing the same pair of black leggings for three days. It’s time to do laundry.
15. “I’ll be fine wearing these new shoes tonight.”
The shoes may be cute, but they will never be cute enough to make up for the pain you’ll feel tonight.