When I came across Elite Daily’s “Why Chivalry is Dead, From a Man’s Perspective,” I was disappointed to say the least. I’m a hopeless romantic and the classic product of a girl raised on Disney movies and Nicholas Sparks novels. Call me crazy, but I think men should hold the door open for a lady no matter the situation, and I always take notice when a guy doesn’t do this for me, even if he’s just a stranger in Starbucks.
The Elite Daily article does make a very valid argument, attributing our generation’s lack of chivalry to the rise of the hook up culture, but places a majority of the blame on women. Maybe the author has a point, and maybe us women are letting guys get away with the bare minimum. Of course, we could blame our male counterparts for chivalry’s death, but still, that would just be the tip of the iceberg.
The problem may not be that today’s Generation Y men lack chivalry, but instead that they are very rarely given the chance to act on it. Seriously, who goes on dates these days? In college, DFMOs and late night booty calls have become the status quo, so many Collegiettes will graduate without ever having been on a real date (No, Ian’s Pizza at 3am does not count).
It’s possible that chivalry may only be dead in a college setting. As girls, we often let guys slide by with the excuse that they’re just being immature college boys. We keep telling ourselves that the frat bros we party with each weekend will magically turn into respectable young men after graduation, but who are we kidding?
It’s about time for chivalry to make a comeback. Girls are not asking to be showered with gifts, flowers and expensive dinners every single day. We know you’d much rather save your money for double rail mixers at the KK, but chivalry is not only an action; it’s a mindset. Yes, we are all capable of opening doors for ourselves, but chivalry reminds us what our mothers have been telling us for the last twenty years, that we are special. Chivalry gives ladies that warm and fuzzy feeling, and it lets us know that we’re worth it.
Being chivalrous does not make a guy a stage-five clinger, a momma’s boy or a wimp. It shows that he’s interested in a girl for more than her looks and more importantly, chivalry speaks true to his character. In my possibly naïve mind, chivalry translates into respect.
So, maybe Disney did give us slightly unrealistic views of love and relationships, but the time has come for guys to bust out those dusty VHS tapes and take a lesson from Prince Charming.