Let’s face it, the gym is a scary place. There are huge machines with really fit people everywhere using those huge machines, and the thought of judgment looming over you. What’s even worse is Golden Hawks are known for being super fit and super healthy. When you walk into the Laurier Athletic Complex there is an immediate expectation that you are a hard-working, perspiration-driven athlete. But what happens if you’re not? Well, you’re overwhelmed, probably nervous, and unsure of how you are going to make it through this experience. Here are some things that may run through your mind when entering that jungle for the first time.
1. How on Earth do you operate this machine thing? Do I sit on it? Do I climb over it? Are there instructions?
Realistically, when you walk into this place, it’s like a jungle gym. People are sitting on things, hanging off bars, lifting heavy stuff. Where do you even begin?
2. Is there anyway I can do this to make it look like I’ve done this before?
Can I give all of these fab fit people the illusion that I am no amateur…not likely. I am looking around like a child in an amusement park with no idea where to start. That’s okay, pick one and go for it.
3. Who set this machine for 250lbs?! Is that even possible? Would I ever be able to do that?
*Looks at arms, pokes at inexistent muscles*
4. That guy is really hot.
Thank God my outfit looks cute, at least I know how to dress, if not exercise, am I right?
5. Woah, I’m out of shape. Like, really out of shape.
I have a cramp, and my cramp has a cramp. Is this normal?
6. How is she STILL running? It’s been at least 10 minutes. Kudos to you girl. Goals.
7. That guy is even hotter.
Where do I find myself one of him? Other than the gym, that is.
8. I’m obsessed with her leggings, would it be weird if I asked her where she got them? Yes. Yes it would be very weird.
9. Ok, I’m sweating. I’m exhausted. That’s enough for today.
10. Maybe I should just take a selfie. Location: Laurier Athletic Complex. Caption: #fitlife
11. Attempts to strut out of the place like a queen but the gate glitches and you look like an idiot in front of the adorable gym staff.
12. Decides that wasn’t TOOOOO bad. Actually, I feel pretty damn good about myself. I can definitely make this a thing.