In the last few days I’ve come across multiple articles about a new, disturbing trend in the world of sex: stealthing. Haven’t heard about it yet? Well listen up.
What is Stealthing?
According to multiple sources, the term stealthing refers to the act of a man removing a condom during sex without the acknowledgement or consent of their partner. Apparently, several online communities supporting this act have recently been discovered, and it is rumoured that there may be “stealth condoms” on the market, which are intended to break after minimal friction.
Obviously, this increases the possibility of STDs, STIs and of course, pregnancy.
This trend is just recently being explored by media, so it is unknown exactly how common this practice is and how long it has been a trend. Currently, it appears to be unclear whether this type of sexual assault is considered rape, but regardless, it is a type of gendered violence that needs attention. Stealthing is opening the discussion of sexual assault, rape, gender violence and safe sex to the population and the media, which is ALWAYS an important discussion.
Check out some recent articles about stealthing here: 1, 2, 3, 4
How Can You Protect Yourself?
Get tested
No matter how many or how few partners you’ve had, you should be getting tested for STDs. In Canada, testing services are free, confidential and can be anonymous.
Talk about it
You should always discuss sex with your potential or current partner(s). Discussing safe sex before any activity ensures you will use a method of protection that is appropriate for all parties. This conversation may include what kind(s) of birth control or protection you’ll use, who purchases it, and what types of activity are appropriate and consensual. If you don’t trust your partner to buy reliable protection, you shouldn’t be having sex with them. It’s never a bad idea to have an extra condom (or 2) on hand.
While we’re on this topic, it is very healthy to discuss what you do and do not consent to during sex. No matter what type of sex you may be engaging in, a clear discussion of what is and is not allowed is very important, not only in terms of sexual activity but also for building trust and improving communication in your relationship. Using and having safe words, being vocal and being communicative during sex is imperative.
Since this trend is relatively new in the media, it’s important to stay informed and keep up to date on new information as it is being published. Make sure the sources you’re using are legitimate and reputable, as we all know #alternativefacts are not so valid. So collegiettes, be smart, be safe and be aware.
If you have experienced any kind of sexual assault, talk to someone! Both hotlines below are free and confidential.
Assaulted Women’s Helpline: 1-866-863-0511
National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673