Girl, sit on down, we’re about to have a chat.
Are you a virgin? Are you not a virgin? It doesn’t matter, because virginity is a big fat lie that society uses to shame you no matter what your answer is!
Your sexuality has nothing to do with any guy, what he does, or what he “takes away from you.” You are in charge of your body at all times, and you don’t lose anything by having sex. Having sex for the first time is much like your first kiss — it’s only as important as you deem it to be. Nothing physically changes for you, and you should do it when you’re comfortable and give consent.
And, for the love of all things that are holy, your first time is not supposed to hurt. Nothing is supposed to rip, there’s not supposed to be any blood, and you should be comfortable the whole time.
If you’re not, slow down, readjust, and make sure you’re really ready. Don’t let anyone convince you otherwise, because they are wrong. I’m serious.
The concept of virginity is also completely heterosexual. I don’t know about you, but I know lesbians who are pretty sexually active. Does that still mean that they’re virgins because they’ve never had sex with a man? Never been “properly” penetrated?
On the flip side, does a man have to have sex with another man to be considered no longer a virgin? Then why should you?
It’s ridiculous to think that one type of sex is the end-all-be-all to your body. A penis going inside of you has no more physical significance than any other act you may commit with any other partner you may have.
You don’t lose or give up any part of yourself. You are complete and whole on your own. No one can give you that or take it away.
If you want your first time to be special, make it special. But do not think that you’re sacrificing anything about yourself because of it.