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Your Honest Guide to Casual Hook-Ups : Terminology

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Western chapter.

 

If you’re having a casual or unofficial sexual relationship with someone right now that is driving you nuts, I bet that you saw this and you clicked on it right away. That’s because the question as to whether or not casual sex can turn into a relationship is constantly arguable, debatable, and seemingly never answered.

Before getting into whether your casual fling can turn into your next beloved in Part 2 of this article, let’s first explore the different types of casual hook-ups:

First, we have your One Night Stand. This kind of hook-up can usually be the one that you’ll regret for life or tell your kids about. The One Night Stand hook-up works exactly as it sounds: one night. This is when you get to act out your shameless, lustful passions and engage in some super raunchy sexual behavior due to a lonely drunk night at the bar, a bad break-up, or pure spontaneity.

Then we have our Several Night Stand, which varies from 2 times to several. This is the One Night Stand guy or girl that you continue to bump uglies with for a couple of more rounds, or until one of you moves on to a new partner.

The Booty Call is a bit different: the Booty Call could be the one night stand guy or girl, and it may also be someone you already know (i.e. a past partner, old flame, unfinished business). The Booty call is somewhat unexpected at first, and then may become an unanticipated routine. At that certain time of morning, day or night (or whatever is convenient for the Booty Caller), you meet-up, share the goods, and go about your day not expecting anything more.

Casual Sex Partners are two people who mutually agree to have sex with no strings attached. Casual sex partners are only buddies in the sense that they help each other get sexual release. These are probably the people who have multiple sex partners with you on the side, and might replace you out of boredom or if something better (or serious) come along.

The Friends with Benefits must not be confused with the Fuck Buddy. Friends with Benefits, or FWB, may have a respectable relationship outside of the sexual arena. They may have been friends prior to coitus, and still hangout side-by-side in a non-sexual relationship. The Friends with Benefits may extend their relationship to outside matters: talking on the phone, going to the movies, having serious conversations, studying together- and have sex as a mutually agreed way of experimenting or releasing some pent-up sexual frustration.

The Cuddle Buddies are two people who do not have sex together, but may simply enjoy cuddling with a warm person or may use this cuddling out of fear of sexual rejection (or to fool you into thinking that they aren’t trying to get in your pants). It may include spooning and some light or heavy petting, but sex is off limits. The cuddle buddy may confuse the hell out of you: no matter here, just take a cold shower and think about unicorns.

The Long-Distance Sex Buddy is that person you may have met while spending a drunken weekend at McMaster, and hook-up every time you are both in a convenient place. There is almost a bit of loyalty here- but only up to the point that they would still come and see you for some bootay. You may spend a weekend every couple of weeks together playing house and rolling round in the hay, but after that, conversation and sparks dwindles until the next reunion.

The Almost-Partner-But-Not-Really is quite possibly the most frustrating of causal sexcapades (aside from cuddling, of course). This is the person who you spend all your energy on, go out on “dates” with and hook-up, and can extend your relationship to matters besides sex. You’re both all touchy and stare into each other’s soul and may let sweet nothings slip out of your mouth. But then the bombshell hits: “I’m not ready for a relationship”. The Almost-Partner may always stay an almost partner, out of confusion for their feelings for you or just to get sex on the reg.

 

Rida is a fourth year student at the University of Western Ontario and is extremely excited about the opportunity to bring Her Campus to London! She recently changed her major from Finance to English Literature after finally realizing what she wanted to do with her life. Having spent her whole life in the Middle East (Dubai and Saudi Arabia) Rida had no choice but to grow up a shopaholic! Having shifted from the desert to the great ice box that is Canada, she still finds it difficult to adjust to the freezing weather. In her spare time, Rida likes reading, watching way too many shows, stuffed crust pizza and,of course, shopping! Her aspirations are to one day live in Paris and be a writer for Vogue.