Need I say more – if first year at UWO is done properly these items will be completed almost naturally. When you finish this bucket list, consider yourself among the truest and purplest of Mustang freshmen.
1. Join a club.
Clubs week takes place in September each year and there’s literally hundreds of hobbyist, activist, pre-professional and recreational clubs to choose from. If you plan on being a mess first year, the one decent thing you can do for your future is pay the club fee and put down your club membership as an extra-curricular on your resume. If you’re already thinking post-grad – join the pre-law or pre-med societies. If you love animals and the environment – join the Wildlife Conservation Society. Fashion guru – sign up for Fashion and Lifestyle Society. Love to shake it – join the Dance Force. Passionate about charity and giving back – join the Heart and Stroke Club or the Best Buddies Club. Seriously, check out the list and get involved – the opportunities here are endless!
2. Lose your bus pass and/or student card.
This is so standard, it’s almost sad. After you get over the hype of wearing your first year lanyard, student card, and room key as an accessory around your neck (only in season during September), you begin to act normal again and store these items in your purse/school bag along with your treasured LTC pass. And then some how, some way, in between Nat Sci and the UCC…it’s G O N E. Post about it on “Class of 20__” FB page all you want – it’s gonezo. I will also accept “locking your room card in your bedroom” for this one. I kid you not, my floormates in first year did this collectively at least 70 times during semester one alone.
3. Catch the Mustang express home from Richmond Row.
The Mustang Express is a true hidden gem at UWO. You’re tired, you’ve had a couple (12) drinks. You don’t have enough money for a Lil Caesar’s $5 medium. You’re now devastated and emotional, and you just want to get the f*ck home. You look up the street – what’s that in the distance? Is that the Mustang Express? It’s a real thing????? Nothing can preserve your dignity and spare your wallet quite like the magic of the FREE Mustang Express pulling up to the curb just before you fall asleep on the sidewalk or burst into drunken tears. Take advantage of that $12.50 Mustang Express fee paid through your tuition and go home, girl. Just call it a night.
4. Pull an all-nighter at the Weldon Library.
You’ve got your cute library outfit on (pajamas) and plan to plug away studying like an actual university student for a few hours at Club Weldon. Six coffees/Red Bulls later – it’s 4am, Weldon has sucked out your soul, and you can’t remember anything you’ve read in the last two hours. This is part of the vibrant nightlife you experience as a dedicated Western student (procrastinator). The only positive here is the free midnight breakfast next door in the Mustang Lounge during exams – because there is absolutely nothing in this world that pancakes cannot fix.
5. Fear for your life (outfit) upon hearing the weather siren.
Google it if you don’t believe that Western actually invested tuition money into this. What is a weather siren you may ask? It’s the loudest, most obnoxious horn signaling students so they “receive the earliest possible warning in case of imminent weather danger.” If that’s not enough and we’re really about to get shit on, a nasally voice tells you to “take immediate action and seek shelter”. Say hello to London, Ontario, ladies – and goodbye to the prospect of a good hair year.
6. Binge on after-hours snack bar in residence eateries.
If you think dinner stops after 8:00pm, you’re dead wrong and I’m so sorry to hear that you’ve lived your life that way thus far. Interactive fajita bar anyone? Perhaps some onion rings, fried ravioli, spring rolls, fried chicken, mac’n cheese? There truly is no other feeling of satisfaction (guilt) like washing some spiral fries down with a cinnamon bun just before bed. Served until 11:00pm or 12:00am depending on your residence. Get it while it’s hot!
7. Tweeting/Facebook status-ing about the shitty wifi on campus.
Similar to most distressing experiences in life, there are stages one goes through during a true episode of wifi malfunction rage. You’re done with denial, repeated attempts, and threatening/harming your computer. Now all that’s left to do is what any decent person would do – and that’s to post your uncensored feelings on social media. Screw you too, Western – I didn’t even want to go on Perezhilton.com during 9:30AM class ANYWAYS. I didn’t want to submit that Sakai quiz worth 15% of my grade that I just spent an hour googling the answers for EITHER. #bye.
8. Have a stand-off with a flock of Canada geese.
I’d have to say this is one of the scariest things about Western. It’s not flunking out after first semester, it’s not getting your booze taken away by residence staff or getting a letter of warning – it’s the f*cking Canada Geese that situate themselves everywhere on campus with the sole purpose of inconveniencing our lives. I’m as in love with animals as they come, but once you look into the beady little eyes of these creatures you can tell they can and will fight you. So don’t try to be a hero and just walk around them. Even if it takes five extra minutes and you’re late for class – if you value your life, you’ll do it.
So there you have it my newly admitted Western ladies. If you can survive #8, you can definitely survive your degree. Good luck, be safe and have fun!!!