There are 24 hours in a day…though the days often feel much shorter at Wake Forest. Between classes, homework and tons of extracurricular activites, it can be hard for a collegiette to squeeze in time to eat or sleep (though we often still manage to find time to rage…) With jam packed schedules like these, it can also be hard to make time to spend with the people who are important to us, whether that be a friend, a boyfriend or a potential boyfriend. The free time we have to enjoy ourselves with others should be just that: stress-free and fabulous. But what happens when your precious time just isn’t enough to keep your friends, boyfriends and most importantly, you, happy and engaged? Why then, collegiettes you may face a classic dilemma… the friends OR the boyfriend.
When confronted with a choice like this, it may seem impossible to pick a “best” solution. What do you do? If you choose to go out with your girlfriends, your guy may feel ignored and lash out. If instead you choose to go out to a romantic din with your boyfriend, your girls may feel like they’re second best. The solution seems obvious: just divide up your time evenly among both! Too bad this antidote is waaaay easier said than done. But have no fear, collegiettes, that’s why I’m here! I’m going to give you some tried and true ways to balance your social life between girls and boys…that way you won’t HAVE to choose.
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Plan, plan, plan ahead
The best way to fix having to make this kind decision? Avoid any kind of last minute decision making at all. If you plan ahead, you’ll be able to divvy up your time in a way that satisfies everyone. I know it sounds old fashioned, but sometimes a calendar can be a girl’s secret weapon when it comes to the age-old friend/boyfriend dilemma. Taking the time to physically go through your week’s plans and decide what you want to do ahead of time can make a big difference. Plus, it’ll make your friends feel appreciated if you send a text a few days in advance letting them know you’d love to do dinner/shopping/go out on Friday. The same goes for your boyfriend (just don’t ask him to do something at the same time, duh!) If you get a “yes”, you can put the date on your calendar (or in your iPhone) and be stress free for the rest of the week. Now, you can enjoy your weekend instead of scrambling last minute for plans to accommodate everyone.
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Let him miss you
Collegiettes, this nugget of enlightenment proves true not only when faced with a decision of BF/BFFs, but for relationships in general. If you go to the same school as your guy, it’s easy to see why your friends may feel left out (and why your roommate may get annoyed…) No matter how close (or far) your guy is, it’s imperative that you give him some time to let him miss you. There’s nothing more frustrating than when a boyfriend’s presence starts to grate on you and get on your nerves. Why does this happen? Because you’re spending too much time together (YES, such a thing is possible!) To prevent this from happening, and help keep the relationship with your girls going strong, make sure to designate a night a month that is truly a “girl’s” night (AKA there’s NO chance that your boyfriend might just “surprise” you or mysteriously show up at the same place…). Taking this time out will remind you why you love your girls, and having some time apart will remind you how special your guy is to you. A little bit of absence does make the heart grow fonder.
Playing eenie, meenie, minie …boyfriend or girlfriend? is so middle school. Instead, take the time to figure out your plans in advance, that way you can make sure they’re fair. Yes, it may seem like a little bit of work, but it’s much better than hurting someone that you care about’s feelings. Strategize your time, making sure that it includes a girl’s night that can give you time apart from your guy so he can reminisce on how hot/amazing/perfect you are. Follow these tips so you don’t have to choose…and everyone (your BF, BFFs and YOU) will win!