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Reasons Finding a Sorority Little is Just Like Dating

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Virginia Tech chapter.

The big/little process is a rollercoaster ride that some might find similar to dating. Throughout the weeks you are assigned “buddies,” who are new members that you have to mentor and welcome into the sorority. At the end of the period you rank each other to determine who your little will be. As you meet new members you become especially close to some girls, but what do you do once you find the one you want to be your little?

Here are some ways finding a little is exactly like dating:

It is hard trying to get close to a potential little, but knowing she is also talking to other girls. Does she like you the best? This is similar to The Bachelor, where every contestant insists that no other girl has as strong a connection to him as she does.

When your friends ask, “Do you like anyone yet?” and you get all excited and ask them to keep it a secret. You recount the details of your relationship to them and look for validation that she is reciprocating.

You get jealous when other sisters become their buddy for the week. Your relationship has not yet been defined as exclusive, so any other girl is fair game to steal your dream little away.

You don’t mean to, but you accidentally learn her class schedule and what days you share a lunch break.

You wonder, how often is it okay to ask her to hang out? You don’t want to come on too strong and make her feel like she’s being suffocated.

Sometimes you stalk her online to see what kind of girl she was in high school, and see what you might have in common.

Trying to stand out to your little among all her other buddies is like trying to stand out at a frat party among all the other single girls. You have to really put yourself out there, get attention and set yourself apart from the rest. This tactic is also used in The Bachelor, during the first party where everyone is trying to make a lasting first impression.

A sister once said that finding a sorority little is like the game of LIFE, you know you are going to end up married in the end, but you do not know which one you will end up with.

Love at first sight is definitely a thing in the sorority world of littles. Sometimes you meet a girl and immediately envision her as one of your bridesmaids. She is absolutely perfect for you in every way possible and could very well be the best friend you have been searching for.

Sometimes you use wing-women to figure out how they feel about you. Friends or sisters simply name drop you in conversations, and detail the potential littles reaction.

You want to ask them, “What are we?” the day before ranking so that you can prepare yourself. You know they like you, but how much? Do they like another girl better than you? Do they know how you feel about them?  

All in all, there is nothing like receiving the name of your little-to-be and jumping up to do a happy dance in the middle of the library. Regardless of whether or not she was the girl you have been pining over for weeks, you still get a little sister to show around and spoil with gifts. Now you can stop wondering if she likes you back and start tricking her.

You cannot just casually tell a girl she is your little, you must make a grand gesture in a creative way. Typically, this comes in the form of a basket that is presented every day for a week, followed by a cute scavenger hunt revealing you as her big. Much like a prince would give a princess, you want to lavish them with handmade gifts that show how much hard work you are willing to put into the relationship, but also show just how well you know them. Similar to trying to figure out how much your friends spent on their significant other for Christmas, you have to eye up the other bigs to see how much they are giving their littles. You think you are going over the top and your baskets will be the best, but you never know what kind of competition you are facing.

The week of presents includes a daily clue and a lot of trickery and mixed signals to convince your little she did not get matched with you as her big. From the little’s perspective, this is similar to the week before a guy asks you to be his girlfriend. You are confused as to where you stand, and nothing he says is making any sense. Honestly his clues are probably even harder to understand than the, “Two Truths and A Lie” clue given by your big.

A mechanical engineering sorority girl who will sprint across the drill field just to pet a dog.
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