“I don’t care what people think about me.”
I say right before it takes me half an hour to find something to wear.
“Who cares?”
I declare soon after asking my roommate’s opinion of my hair a million and five times.
“Stop caring so much.”
I advise to my friend as I stare at myself in the mirror trying to figure out if I look bad today.
Obviously, we care about what people think of us. Everyone does.
That’s why I find this “online dating” craze to be so intimidating.
I know I’m in college and I get that everyone is using Tinder or something similar, but that’s a bandwagon I just don’t know if I’m okay with jumping on.
Don’t get me wrong, I have plenty of friends who use the app and claim it’s “just for fun” but I don’t know if I believe that’s entirely true. I think some sort of self-gratification is achieved throughout the process.
From what I understand, the app allows the users to pursue suitors that cross their screens. So, in reality, Tinder gives the individual the ability to judge if they are interested in someone based on one picture and a short bio section. The best part about this app? You don’t get to know who has seen your profile and they don’t know if you’ve seen theirs’. You only receive a notification after “matching” with someone. Meaning, you are only alerted if you mutually find each other to be attractive in some way.
I personally just can’t seem to get over my self-consciousness. I think I would be mortified if someone that I know in real life saw me on the app. I’d know I’m using it for the hell of it, but would they? Tinder also has some not-so-positive stigmas associated with it. Will the people that see my picture on their screen assume that I’m desperate or seeking a hookup?
Who knows? Why do people purposely put themselves in that situation, especially on a college campus, where you are bound to encounter one of the thousands of online daters in person?
Here’s my guess. It seems that the app gives the user some sense of empowerment. Plus, in some way, I’m sure the users feels justified in their actions. I say this because the app essentially requires the operator to be shallow and somewhat superficial. Now, I get that this sounds a lot like bad-mouthing, but in all honesty, the app does sound kind of exciting.
It provides the sensation of anonymity since all interaction is through technology, while simultaneously connecting real people with each other. Many criticize dating outlets by suggesting that people should put in more effort in day-to-day life and stop searching for suitors online. However, it honestly takes a lot of courage to create an online dating account and I’m slowly realizing that it’s nothing to be embarrassed of.
Going back to my go-to words of encouragement: who cares? If you’re an online dater, more power to you.