The Myth of Balance

Here we are. School, work, friends, fitness (because endorphins), chores, and personal time are something we should balance and work on a little bit every day, right? Maybe not. I used to think that planning out the perfect day—wake up, meditate for 10 minutes, eat a healthy breakfast while watching a TED talk, go to class 10 minutes early to chat with the professor and skim the text, etc. would help me live a balanced life.

A quick analogy—CrossFit. I used to be an avid CrossFitter for about a year. It was a fantastic, challenging year full of PR’s (personal records) in strength, speed, and endurance for me. I pushed myself in ways I hadn’t before because I had to be a balanced athlete, never favoring one ability over another—doing this would inevitably come to bite me in the rear. It was exhausting. To constantly work a little bit each time in the gym on all my skills, strength, and speed, I spent 1-2 hours in the gym almost every day. Something like 15 minutes of handstand drills, a 20 minute MetCon for cardio, squats and squat cleans and squat clean pulls for an hour started to wear on me. I felt confident physically, but drained emotionally. In the end, I’m beyond glad that I prioritized my physical health for this season of my life while I did have the time to explore what movement I enjoy and what I don’t. 

Remember, I said prioritize, not balance. Sometimes, I prioritize my health. Sometimes, I work in Pomodoros on the weekend to increase my focus on my schoolwork and understanding thereof. Sometimes, I prioritize relationships and intentionally put the phone away. That way, I can take as much time as I need on a conversation instead of glancing at my phone, wondering if I need to leave for something else. *Everything* has its season. And no one has the right answer but you.

You cannot do all the things, all the time, more of the time. Period. You will either burn out or be a new kind of fictional super-being. What you can do is prioritize.

Here’s what I want you to do:

1. Take out your phone. Set a timer for 2 minutes.
2. Sit still, close your eyes, and envision your life as you want it.
3. Do it!
4. Now, you may have envisioned a “perfect” life. Healthy eating, time to work out, going to office hours and studying for 50 minutes/class. What are you doing in the morning? How do you feel when you wake up and as you walk through the day? Do you challenge yourself more, or do you give yourself more grace and rest? 
5. The answer to these questions are the symptoms of your priorities. What you envisioned is what your life can look like, if you take it by the moment. 
6. Finally, envision what may trip you up. For example, my phone is always in my bed—it’s hard not to want to simply silence it and roll over, or pick it up and start scrolling through Instagram. 

Envisioning your goals, your roadblocks, and even your failures can be a useful exercise in predicting what you may need to address first to help set you up for success, while embracing failure as part of the learning process. Take it one step, one priority, one moment at a time.

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