My messages are a nuclear war zone. Cluttered with various group chats and unread texts from 3 weeks ago, I have an upwards of 50+ neglected or unaddressed messages, and I am completely okay with that. Those on the receiving end of my apathy, however, are not the hugest fans. To be honest, I can shamelessly say I’m on my phone pretty regularly. It’s normally at an arm’s distance away, so the chances of me seeing a text within 30 minutes are pretty high unless I’m tending to important business such as school, work, or conspiracy theories. That being said, even though I am aware of my messages, I’m not trying to blatantly ignore anyone or make myself look “cooler” for having a lot of unread messages.
Most of the time I do text back- three days later, in the middle of the night, responding to not one, but an onslaught of agitated people. I attribute much of my negligence to read receipts that are currently off. If on, most people feel obligated to respond immediately as to not offend the sender. In my mind, if I don’t turn it on than other people won’t get insulted knowing that I responded 8 hours after reading it. However this backfires, and I end up forgetting to respond within a reasonable amount of time. Despite my terrible tendency, I still consciously leave read receipts off; I find solace in leaving it at “Delivered.” The sender can wonder if I’ve seen it or if I’m neglecting them. It sounds psychotic, but it’s a small exercise of power I wield that I lack in larger parts of my life.
That being said, I don’t ignore every text. I respond to communication based on the level of urgency. My brother inquiring about family affairs will yield a contrasting response time to someone telling me how plastered Ashley from biology got last night. It sounds harsh, but that’s just my thought process.
If I notice the conversation is small talk, I tell myself to respond later because it’s not time sensitive, but then it gets lost in my other texts. Suddenly I’ll remember 72 hours later at 1:14AM that Chad from back home asked me how I felt about Ratatouille, so now I’m up replying to someone about a fictional rodent, which then reminds me to respond to about five other people and three group chats about something else.
I never intend to ignore anyone trying to get ahold of me. Sometimes I feel like not responding, or I want to think about a response, or I don’t have anything to add to the conversation, or I truly just forget. Whatever the reason, I still try to at least respond, even if it’s a couple days later and outside of texting etiquette. Now if you call me on the other hand, that’s a completely different story. Try that the next time you really need to get ahold of me.