If the “porn issue” was a teeter-totter, I have spent all of my days on the playground, sitting criss-cross in the middle, clinging for support, and trying not to fall off. And while my ride on this political see-saw was far from comfortable, something about choosing a side still feels objectively wrong when my opinions vary day-by-day, twitter argument-by-twitter argument, documentary-by-documentary.
Somedays the “angel” on my shoulder is able to convince me that sex was a private act, a sacred act, an act to be treasured just like my pastor had advised. But other days, when I sit over brunch talking about the dirty details of my love affairs, the angry red devil assures me that I have no right to demand that sex be private, when I wear my sexual heart on my sleeve every day. And while pornography has always been presented as a black and white, devil and angel, religious and atheist scenario, I find it rather unfortunate that opinions of porn and religious affiliation are tangled in some messy web of morality.
Popular opinion has lead us all to believe that no weekly churchgoer could ever possibly support a healthy incorporation of porn into one’s sex life. Just as the agnostic could never reject porn, and its patriarchal, and oppressive structure. Instead, we’ve allowed religion and anti-pornography beliefs to be married into some sort of strange, inseparable union. Which is exactly why so many people remain teetering on the shaky middle ground of “I don’t know how to feel.”
For me, a religious faith has never stood at the epicenter of my life, and “sin” was never a factor in my resistance against porn. Rather, my hesitance with slipping on the title of “pro-porn” stemmed both from my strong feminist identity, and my ever-growing love for sex. And while we all know the narrative of feminists waving their arms, and pointing their fingers at all the gender inequality and abuse in the industry, for most of us in the modern hookup culture, we have completely devalued sex in its beautiful, natural form.
And though I claim the title of “liberal” in most respects, the concept of “casual sex” has never sat well with me. But again, this resistance did not arise in fear that I would be eternally damned for sleeping with someone pre-martially; sex was simply something that was special and sacred to me, with or without a God.
With that, my opinions of porn often sway to the right-winged side of things, because the idea of connectionless, loveless sex, was an extremely uncomfortable concept. But more importantly, the idea of sex as some sort of bizarre business transaction is something I simply cannot get on board with. And though I have no right to demand others to feel the way I do, I cannot accept an industry that corrupts the beauty of something that I love and respect.
And what I wish more people understood is that I don’t need a bible to believe that sex isn’t something that should be casual or profitable. I don’t need the guilt of sin to make me unsettled by the proposition of such an intimate act being readily available on social media networks, and one click away on PornHub.
In this time of political divisiveness, perhaps one of the only uniting factors among us is that the majority of us are sexually active, or will be at some point of our lives. And though there is an infinite list of arguable topics, can any of us really disagree that sex in committed, loving relationships, takes the sexual cake? Is there truly a better feeling than being in the midst of pure, passionate, and deeply intimate sex? And though I have been the occasional consumer of porn, and understand very well that porn can be healthily incorporated into every day lives, just as social drinking, and the monthly cigarette can be, are we willing to risk devaluing the beauty of love-driven sex, for an industry as corrupt as the porn industry?
Image Source: http://www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/love-sex/sex/a11665388/best-sex-ever-virgin/