A promise to myself to never sacrifice anything for someone who doesn’t deserve my time
One day I was mindlessly scrolling through Facebook, when one of my friends posted an article listing different ways to ruin your life by age 25. The title sparked my interest and without a second thought I clicked on the link and started reading through the list. However, none struck me more than the one that said “to fall in love with someone who makes you fall out of love with yourself.” I tried reading the rest of the article but my eyes were glued to that sentence. The more I read it the more I recalled my own experiences with a similar situation. It reminded me of the familiar pang in your chest after a breakup and the confusion that floods your mind taunting you, leaving you wondering what went wrong in something that was once so good.
Falling in love isn’t a fairytale and it certainly doesn’t always work out like how it does in our favorite rom-coms. There are ups and downs, arguments and good times, but those are to be expected. However no one ever taught me how to treat myself after a relationship ended. After a relationship that ended less than ideal, I sat there for months wondering what I did wrong and what I could’ve changed about myself to save whatever was falling apart at that time. Looking back on it now, I can’t believe I ever let myself feel that way. I was someone who always took pride in taking care of myself and making sure that my emotional and mental health was safe and sound. But soon I became someone I couldn’t even recognize in the mirror, and ultimately ended up hating who I was as a person in the process.
But this article isn’t about the gritty details or to create pity for myself. This is about me realizing what I never was able to put into words until now. Here is me proclaiming that I know I deserve better. Here is me listing all the things that I will not allow myself to do or become just for another person who does not deserve me.
- I will not degrade myself.
- I will not sacrifice my education for someone else.
- I will not allow myself to believe that I will never find someone who will treat me better.
- I will never allow myself to think my life ends after a relationship.
- I will not be afraid to go out in fear of seeing an ex.
- I will not put someone else’s happiness above my own.
- I will not convince myself that I was not good enough.
- I will not wait for someone else to put my heart back together; only I can do that.
- I will not give my time to someone who makes me feel bad about who I am as a person.
- But most importantly, I will never give myself to someone who does not deserve me.
Remember these words by Mark Twain when you find yourself in a similar situatuon: never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.