Late on a beautiful Thursday afternoon I got out of my 3:30 pm class and noticed how nice the weather was. Typically, on days such as this one, many students tend to be out and about all over campus. I figured this was the perfect time to ask the student body at large (by that I mean random people who agreed to talk to me) a rather uncomfortable question: What is your most embarrassing memory in College? The answers were great. Every time I dropped a plate in the dining hall, or fell off my longboard while cruising around campus, or responded inappropriately to a question I completely misinterpreted has made me feel like I’m always messing up and embarrassing myself in some way, shape or form. My clutzy-ass self became curious: Do I embarrass myself more than other people? I don’t…..or at least that’s what I tell myself. In search of closure and reassurance fueled by curiosity and an excuse to talk to random people (some of whom were quite gorgeous), “I said f**k it” and made conversation with a number of unique and interesting people asking them to to describe to me their most embarrassing moments. Here is what I found.
Laughter as a diuretic?
“No one actually knows about this one….but my friend made me laugh so hard I peed my pants”. -Marissa, Senior
The girl who infiltrated the class
“Well, I’m a Freshmen and like, I’m in Spanish 302, and the first day that I was in the class, apparently it got canceled and I didn’t know, so like I got there and sat down in the class, ‘cause it was the classroom but it turned out that it got canceled because another class had to do something in there, so I sat through the entire class.” – Steph, Freshmen
Darn Those Stairs
“I tripped down the stairs…..there were a decent number of people around…..yeah…..” – Shelani, Sophomore
The Stairs Strike Again
“I mean, I fell off the stairs cuz it was raining. I mean, I fell and they walked over me. They didn’t even help me…..so………so”. – Colby, Sophomore
Skating is for the cool kids
“I fell off a skateboard last year and sprained my wrist trying to be cool…and then I stopped skating.” -Atigre, Sophomore
Damn. Dropped. Drink.
“When I was in the Sparket, I had a soda and I dropped it on the floor and it spilled all over and I basically just froze and I didn’t know what to do….so…I had a towel and decided to clean it up with my towel and people were laughing at me, and like the workers didn’t even try to help me anyway they were just looking at me and made me clean it by myself. So then, at that point, I just proceed to go back to my dorm, just go to sleep and just forget about that whole thing.” -Christian, Sophomore
The gym is too big
“One time I got lost trying to get to the pool at the gym”. -Leila, Freshmen
Move-out day just got worse
“At the end of Freshmen year on move-out day someone hit my car, so the cops were surrounding us while everyone was moving out.” -Casey, Sophomore
Shower Power
“Walking out of my room ready to take a shower and I didn’t have my key in my back pocket or like anywhere on me and I was just like in a towel, I just like looked at the door and just banging against the door. I thought it was over. I had to go to a different residence hall in a towel. I had to like go through the woods too.”-Ellis, Freshmen
Fountain Blues
“I fell off my longboard right in front of my dorm. It was like, lunchtime so there was a bunch people at the fountain, and I was like right at the top and there were people walking by too and so, when I fell, I like, yelled, cuz I had headphones on, and so people heard me. And some of the people who lived in my dorm saw me…and it was…it pretty eventful”. -Gabe, Senior
Fried Chicken Wednesday
“My first day of class last year as a Freshman. It was in the Bryan building, and I fell down the stairs during class change. So that was really embarrassing cuz my first class…..a lot of people saw me…my first day of class….my first class…yeah it was a really bad day. I fell down the stairs. And then also last year, I don’t go the caf a lot…just because….uh…I didn’t have a lot of friends last year. But I went one day…shh! (silences her whimpering 10-week old black lab and german shepard mix) I went one day, I went on fried chicken Wednesday cause I wanted it. I went by myself and there was no place for me to sit. I remember walking around the caf like three times looking for a place to sit…..and uh….I had food in one hand and I had my bookbag in the other hand and no place to sit. And I walked around for like 5 minutes and ended up sitting in the very back corner by myself.” -Shelby, Sophomore
The Stairs ain’t gon’ let up
“Ah, what happened…I think I tripped up the stairs going to the caf”. -Rijel, Junior
For all of you out there who are reading this who wanted to be instantly invisible at some inopportune and awkward moment in your life, I hope this article provides a bit of comfort, or just something to relate to. And I also want to point out that, based off of these interviews, I feel like everyone is a goofy fool at one time or another, and there’s no escaping that fact. And a P.S.A. to the rest of y’all: Don’t laugh too hard…you never know who saw you walk into that pole on the sidewalk at night while you were trying to slide into that attractive coworker’s DM’s.