Your job can either be a fun and great experience or something you dread going to every day. I personally believe that you should do something that you love and improves you as a person. I love my job, however, working with 100 people just in your department alone can be a little challenging when trying to figure everything out. The work drama can be extrememly real sometimes and it’s hard to keep track of it all. My main goal for this job was to make friends and be open to a potential SO if it were to happen. So I’m a new hire at my current job, meaning that this is the first semester that I’ve worked there. As a new hire, all the guys who were there prior to us, try to hook up with all the girls before they know all the ins and outs of the group of people we work with. This whole situation is actually proving to be a really terrible experience and I feel like I’m constantly fending off boys. My goals have now changed to just trying to be friends with everyone.
1. Ignore Them
This guy just won’t get the hint that I really don’t care who he hooks up with and texts me about that kind of stuff ALL THE TIME. (Mind you, this is the type of guy who’ll freak out if you don’t text them for a weekend.) He wrongly assumed that since I texted him a question about work and talked to him maybe once that it was okay to text me these kinds of things. I decided that muting his notifications would be the best route to take so that way my personal life wouldn’t be disrupted by his constant texting. I am NOT looking for someone who is clingy and will constantly bringing me down with their problems. I hate to be apathetic, but I need to put myself first and deal with MY issues and by the time I’m done with that I literally have no time for anything else. Sorry not sorry.
2. Create Clear Boundaries
Creating boundaries doesn’t mean that you’re being rude to the person and telling them they suck. You are just clearly and firmly telling them what is okay with you and what you won’t put up with. Believe it or not, there is a way to create boundaries with someone without being rude. You have every single right to tell someone what they’re doing is not okay. It may be awkward during the moment, but once it’s over you’ll be so happy that you made your expectations clear instead of letting them continue to make you uncomfortable.
3. Refrain From Talking About Them Behind Their Back
I am guilty of having a big mouth, which results in me putting my foot in my mouth almost every single day. Almost every single time I’ve gossiped about someone, it has made it back to the person. It’s better to keep your mouth shut in most instances and try to get along with everyone. You may not be a huge fan of everyone you work with, but that doesn’t mean you need to broadcast it towards everyone. Remember, that this is your work place and your reputation will follow you, and being known for being a gossip isn’t exactly a good thing.
4. Avoid Working With Them, If Possible
At my job, shifts get randomly assigned so if you and this person have a similair schedule, you could be working with them on all your shifts. This actually happened to me this week because I happened to be working two shifts with him. Luckily, at my job it is extremely easy to drop or trade shifts so I was able to avoid the situation entirely and work at a different time. I know that it may seem like a lot to completely change your schedule, but if this person won’t stop, removing yourself from the situation saves you time and grief and will potentially aid in them moving on and leaving you alone.
5. Get Your Boss Involved If Needed
If this guy just won’t stop and you’re tired of his advances, maybe it’s time to get your boss involved. It is not normal to feel uncomfortable at work and you will not seem like a complainer if you talk to your boss about a legitimate situation. Just remember that it is NOT your fault that this guy can’t get the hint and won’t leave you alone, you did NOTHING wrong. It is HIS problem and you shouldn’t feel bad or afraid to bring it up to your boss because you definitely will not get into trouble. Yes, it may be awkward to see this guy afterwards but at least the situation is resolved.
Remember that you control your reactions to every situation, you can either choose to falsely encourage him or be clear with boundaries straight up. What you do with this situation can make or break your work experience!