There’s nothing I love more than the beginning of the school year — being reunited with old friends, making new ones, starting classes, the endless free food Welcome Week brings, and, of course, Gator games in The Swamp. With so much going on, it’s easy to get overwhelmed when we realize how full our calendars are and how little time we have to just relax. I’ve found that in life, it’s rare for things to go exactly according to the plan. Reflecting back on my first year of college, I learned a lot of lessons – not just in the classroom. Here are some things I learned that are necessities for living with an optimistic mindset:
1. Embrace positive change. Change is hard, but sometimes it’s necessary. We’re constantly adjusting and adapting to new environments, and it’s difficult, no doubt. But do what you think is best for you, even if it’s not the easiest decision to make. The results will likely be rewarding.
2. Save time for yourself. We find time for just about everyone except ourselves. It is okay to decline a coffee run or a trip to the Hub for Chick-fil-A every now and then if it means you’ll get a little time to relax. I know I’m guilty of it. I fill my day from morning to night and find myself wishing I had 10 more minutes to talk to my mom, read or even nap. Make a conscious effort to pencil in time for you.
3. Accept apologies you’ll never get. Life is messy, and no matter how nice you are, there will be people who don’t think the same way you do. It hurts when you expect an apology and never receive one, whether it be from a friend, a boy, a co-worker or anyone, really. But if you do your best to let it go and forgive them without actually hearing “I’m sorry,” you’ll find yourself infinitely more content. You can’t worry about what someone else should’ve done. Instead, focus on what you will do to make the best of any situation.
4. Acknowledge how you feel. There’s no doubt about it: college is an emotional rollercoaster. Don’t bottle everything up. If you ever need to talk, meet a friend, call a parent, talk to your RA or explore the many on-campus support options, like UF’s Counseling and Wellness Center. And if you’re more of a private person, write it down in a journal. Never deem your feelings unimportant.
5. Own up to your mistakes, but forgive yourself. It takes a great deal of maturity to acknowledge when you’re wrong, but at the same time, you can’t blame yourself forever. We’re human. Mistakes act as lessons. They show us what we should do differently in the future. I’ve blamed myself plenty of times for situations that weren’t necessarily in my control. But as time has passed, I’ve realized I might not be able to control what happens, but I can control how I respond to it.
6. Surround yourself with an encouraging group. If there are people in your life who continually make you feel bad about yourself, you should reconsider your relationships. You’ll be surprised at the difference it makes. Your friends should constantly be lifting you up, not bringing you down.
7. Love yourself. We are often our own worst enemy. That being said, don’t bash yourself! Remind yourself you are capable, intelligent, beautiful and amazing. Your outlook on the world will change when you realize how much is in your hands. Give yourself the respect you deserve.
These are the lessons I will remember for the rest of my college career. Frequently remind yourself of your worth, and enjoy every moment you have here, collegiettes™!