It’s common knowledge — like red means stop and green means go, the leaves change color in the Fall and cat videos on YouTube are always a good idea — that long distance relationships suck.
Or do they?
I sat down with a third-year UCLA student who, after five years in a LDR herself, had quite a lot to weigh in on the subject:
“Long distance relationships suck, and yet I’ve been in one for five years. Have I invested myself so much in this person that I have overlooked our expiration date? Why go through all that effort to make a relationship work with someone whom I only see once or twice a year? These are some of the thoughts that used to run through my head. I say ‘used to’ because I now have a new perspective.
My boyfriend and I broke up on two separate occasions over the years, so I had the chance to date other guys. I don’t think I opened up my heart enough to them because I was reluctant to do so – my heart has always returned to my boyfriend. Our mutual willingness to make our relationship work has really been the key to how we’ve lasted. When you find someone who invests in you as much as you’re willing to invest in them, hold on to that.
I’ve learned so much from him over the years. I used to only focus on the distance in our relationship and how I was unhappy about it, but with his encouragement to focus on the future, I began to see things differently. We are both in college, so being apart actually benefits us in that we can make our priorities school, friends, and extracurriculars. Granted our relationship is important to each other, but we will never again get to experience this time of our lives like we are now. We get to discover ourselves and explore the world on our own terms. Then, when we’re together, it’s like going on a first date all over again because there is so much to keep learning about the other as we each keep learning about ourselves. Growing, but not growing apart, is something I’ve been so grateful for. I think of this time as a training camp to become the best version of myself, and I’m excited to see how this impacts our relationship when we are together again after college.
If there’s anything I’ve learned from my long distance relationship, it’s how much I am capable of loving someone. Yes, long distance is a sacrifice, but in the end it gives you the ability to experience college on your own terms, all while knowing that there is someone at home who loves you and always has your back.”
So what do you think, collegiettes? Is long distance worth it?