It’s time for it to be said: say goodbye to someone if they don’t give any push, love, happiness, and positivity to your life. It’s sad to say- maybe a bit cliché, but friends’ come and go, the real ones do stay and they become family. It’s okay to lose a friend or two; it’s part of life. However, if you’re constantly losing friends left and right, take a step a back and realize if you’re friends are really there for you or vice versa.
I can argue that selfish and selfless have very different meanings but there are some acts that leave you in a rut because they seem to both coincide in certain situations. Not trying to beat around the bush, it’s saddening to say, but, “dropping” someone will most likely be one of the most selflessly selfish acts you can do for your life. You’re not wasting energy or time on a friendship that has gone awry. If you can count the number of people who continue to push you to be a better you, want both of you to be successful, and DO NOT use you, those are the only people you need. Mind you, I’m not saying be anti-social on purpose , I’m simply stating that ridding lousy relationships that should be left behind is not a wrong thing to do.
It takes two to tango so you can’t blatantly stop a friendship or really be the only person to decide when a friendship/relationship is over. However, if they don’t care about having you as a friend in the first place- only when convenient to them they really won’t care if you drop them like it’s hot, unless they suddenly need you as a tool or form of advice. Don’t hurt anyone on purpose either. I’m not claiming to end a friendship because you feel like it (unless you deem it to be appropriate) but talk to the person about how you feel, let them hear you out and hear them out too, communication is key in any form of relationship. Life is trial and error in a lot of cases though, so after a heart to heart and nothing seems to have changed, don’t feel hurt just break off the friendship and start to feel better.
I know it may seem harsh, but through experience and watching the behavior’s of friendship really brings out the true colors in people, not everyone can be your confidant.Growing up it’s difficult to let go of friends but I’ve easily come to realize that the truth hurts and truly the only person you have, is yourself. Always love and take care of yourself so no one else has to. At the end of the day you can only give so much of what you have to someone. After being forgotten on plans, used only for advice or form of transportation, cancelled on plenty of times at random – it’s time to say goodbye to a friendship that was lost a long time ago. It’s okay, personalities clash and rough patches occur, but there should never be a justification for why someone treats you poorly when you’re helping them or you’re sadly, doing a good friend wrong, too.
Being “selfish” (in this aspect) has not only made me more of a positive person, but also, allowed me to only grow, prosper, and surround myself with people who want what’s best for me. Being “selfish” has taught me how to be a “selfless” friend and treat people the way I want to be treated, giving my undivided attention to those I love, care, and appreciate. Reciprocate emotions.
Now if you feel like it’s “right”, it may be your time to be selfish too.