Ask a Guy: Sexy vs. Skanky

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As women, we have a right to feel good about ourselves – to feel sexy. We like to show a little cleavage here and there, or wear short shorts on a warm day. However, the thin line between sexy and skanky is very easy to cross. Have you ever been serious about a guy only to find out that he just wanted to hook up? Or maybe you were hooking up with him, and then he dropped you like a bad habit? Perhaps you crossed over that line, and gave him the wrong impression. Every woman has given that impression at some point in time. Many women are still giving that impression today. People tend to be judgmental and label a girl ‘skanky’ if she wears one provocative outfit. But many fail to realize that it isn’t just an appearance, it’s also an attitude. To shed a little light on the subject, four guys have been interviewed. But first, let’s read a little bio about them.

J.W. Hendricks– A freshman majoring in film. J.W. enjoys watching movies, making movies, and hanging out with friends. He aspires to make it to Hollywood someday.

Sheen Cooks– A sophomore with an undeclared major. During the day, he is the UCF University Involvement Coordinator. At night, he is DJ SheeN BooGIE, a disc jockey in the Orlando night life.

Stefan Rivas– A junior majoring in computer science. Stefan enjoys biking, canoeing, fishing, and playing fútbol (soccer). He currently holds an internship at Voxeo.

Justin Calabrese– A senior majoring in forensic science. Justin is a co-founder of the Sigma Pi fraternity at UCF. He enjoys playing intramural football, working out, and partying on the weekends.

What makes a girl sexy or skanky in…

J.W. -Skanky girls are likely to show more skin. Sexy girls can show skin too, but you can tell they don't dress sexy for the sole reason of impressing guys, as skanky girls do. They have a sense of style that expresses who they are, whereas skanky girls simply express sex. Sexy girls have a very "look but don't you dare touch" appearance and skanky girls have more of a "please touch" appearance. This is where the "chase factor" comes in. How hard is a guy willing to work to get a girl?

Sheen – I LOVE my girls without makeup and in casual clothes. 'Nuff said. But generally for me, sexy can be all about the "dress to impress” factor, too. However, if a girl shows too much cleavage all the time, she crosses the line into the "Skank-Zone."

Stefan - I think if a girl ONLY wears skimpy clothing, it can show to be skanky. But there are times when a girl wants to feel sexy and feels skimpy clothing is the way to go. I respect that. That topic, though, digs much deeper into the American culture itself to see what we feel is sexy and what isn't. Brazilians feel that less clothing is cool, so both men and women do it and aren't judged for it.

Justin - This line is tough…If you look good without body parts hanging out, then that’s really sexy. But then again, if your body parts are hanging out, that’s sexy too. Fishnets = super skanky…always!!! Makeup is really about the guy’s taste…too much…too little…it’s all about what the boy is interested in. Some like the natural look while others love that bright red lipstick look.

J.W. – Sexy girls are more keen on eye contact, which is definitely attractive. Skanky girls don’t really make direct eye contact, as if they care more about what the guy wants to do than what he’s saying, if you catch my drift.

Sheen - It is sexy when a girl can be coy and flirty, not over the top and all over you. I also find it sexy when women use proper grammar in text conversations. Skanky conversations, both in person and in text, include a lot of profanity. Ladies, that ain't cute.

Stefan - A girl’s confidence in herself can be one of the sexiest things she can have. It shows in the way she holds a conversation. I like to think of myself as a sociable guy, so I pick up on the many little things in a conversation, like tone of voice, eye contact, and how a person stands when speaking. A sexy girl simply stands how she wants and looks me dead in the eyes while she talks and laughs, showing her confidence.

Justin – If the girl takes charge and asks you questions, tries to get to know you, and talks about intelligent topics, that’s sexy. But if I meet you in a bar and all we do is flirt, then its straight hook up status. Especially true if the conversation is overly sexual.
J.W. – Sexy girls have an attitude that says a guy must actually put effort into impressing her. On the other hand, when a girl constantly displays that she’s trying to impress guys, a skanky vibe is given off. She will always look around to scope out those whose attention she’s grabbing, rather than just focusing on the person in front of her. But something they don't realize: While they may turn heads, they only stay in the minds of men for a few seconds. They won’t leave an impression like a sexy, but modest looking, girl.

Sheen - Some girls cannot control themselves when they drink, which is a complete turnoff. Skanky behavior in my words can be defined as "thirsty." And for you sexy ladies out there, your smile is the sexiest curve on your body. Flaunt it!

Stefan - What I think separates a girl from being sexy or skanky is when they don’t care about their bodies. For example, when a girl goes to parties, gets black-out drunk, and sleeps with random guys on a recurring basis, not just one bad night. Also skanky, when a girl makes a full force attempt to flirt with a guy by acting really sloppy or grinding on him. This is especially true if they didn’t have a previous conversation.

Justin - Don’t like cocky girls…I look at them more like a hook up. Also, if they start booty calling me at 2 AM, that’s a huge turn off and they usually don’t get any. If you’re just looking for a hook up and not wanting more, then go for it and be easy. But if you’re looking for a boyfriend, then you need to send that strong message right away and you can’t be easy to matter how much tequila you had. 

J.W. - You can tell a lot about a girl simply by her profile picture. I often see orange girls doing the duck face, or even pictures that are mostly taken up by cleavage. Yes, men like cleavage, but they also like class. I'd much rather see a profile picture of a pretty girl on a normal day than that same girl screaming at a party she can't remember. I, for one, like a display of literacy on Facebook. "OMG had u herd wat she did wen she was wasted?" really doesn't help if someone's trying to appear intelligent.

Sheen - I don't use Facebook, but I use Twitter. On Twitter, skanky tweets involve #TwitterAfterDark.

Stefan - I think it's hard to judge being that any status or picture can be taken out of context. But when party pictures are continuously posted, to me it says she's moving into the skanky zone. I don't consider many things on Facebook sexy, unless it's an event where the girl looks really good.

Justin - Facebook is the place to creep without anyone knowing…guys mostly want to see the beach pics. It does little to tell me if you’re skanky or girlfriend material. However, if I am interested, I might go look to find what your interests are or what we might have in common.

Lastly, what do you look for in a girlfriend vs. just a hookup?
J.W. – The biggest factor is how easy it is to talk to her. I think similar mindsets are more important than similar tastes. How well the two can talk about ideas such as love, emotion, the world, and even spirituality. Out of all the traits, I think the sharing of ideas is the most important.

Sheen - Hookup = someone who's just hot. Girlfriend = someone you can bring home to mama.

Stefan - When it comes to dating, I look for a girl I can really enjoy being around and hold a conversation with. Some girls just can’t keep me interested. When looking for a hook up, well…it comes to just that…looking. It starts being about looks, then after a few days whether or not I can bear speaking with them anymore. It sounds harsh, but there are occasions when I feel like a conversation is going nowhere, or I’m asking too many questions and not getting any response back.

Justin - I always look for a girl with intelligence when considering a girlfriend, and she must be easy to talk to. It’s way better if we’re friends first; we get to hang out and casually talk before making such a huge commitment. Also, if she is cool with my boys she is definitely girlfriend worthy.

Sometimes, girls think they can win a guy over with their sex appeal, but end up giving the wrong impression. These guys gave their thoughts on what is Sexy Vs. Skanky. Remember, different guys have different tastes, and you will attract the perfect guy for you by being your natural self. They say college is one of the best times of your life. It’s a time to party and have fun, but that doesn’t mean you should abandon your class. Stay sexy, ladies!

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