Cuffing Season: (noun) During the Fall and Winter months people who would normally rather be single or promiscuous find themselves along with the rest of the world desiring to be “Cuffed” or tied down by a serious relationship. The cold weather and prolonged indoor activity causes singles to become lonely and desperate to be cuffed.
*definition brought to you by Urban Dictionary*
We are officially in the midst of this so-called cuffing season with the holidays being right around the corner. As a girl who has only ever been in serious relationships, the idea of cuffing season has always seemed foreign to me. I for one had never actively been on the search for a boyfriend, so the idea of jumping into a relationship just to have someone to cuddle with did not really make sense to me. I have always been one to heavily think before entering into a relationship, making sure that I would be willing to let myself become emotionally invested in whoever I would be going out with. I am usually picky in who I date, but isn’t it how it should be? Why should I get cuffed just for the sake of being cuffed? Liking to refer to myself as a strong, independent woman who does not need a man, cuffing season sounded ludicrous, and a sad example of how being single is looked down upon.
This has all been called to my attention as I have officially gotten into a relationship during cuffing season for the first time. Now by no means did I get cuffed for the sake of being cuffed, as my friendship with this boy has just slowly but surely been evolving into a different realm. But do not get me wrong, I feel that there is no shame in dating around and jumping into relationships. I have always been a strong proponent of the ideology: you do you boo. If someone wants to hook up with a countless amount of people, great. If someone likes staying single, awesome. My problem is when people get into relationships for the wrong reasons.
Relationships are supposed to be a mutual commitment to be with someone you truly care about and want to be together with. Nowadays, I feel that for young adults, especially those in college, relationships have changed. I find that it is harder to come by someone who is actually in a serious relationship. People seem to be scared of commitment, and more and more people are only in brief flings or casually hooking up. Dating has been reduced to swiping right on hot guys on Tinder while bored in class. In a sense, I believe that cuffing season is just another way to perpetuate this casual relationship agenda. People gravitate towards relationships just to be able to have someone to spend the holiday season with, and then it’s over as quickly as Christmas trees are taken down.
Maybe I am just old fashioned in that I understand relationships in a more serious nature. If I am going to be with someone, I am not doing it for the sake of being in a relationship, but actually because I want to be with the person. To me, love is not simply a frivolous object that is tossed around whenever it is convenient. Love should be a high level of understanding between two people that no one else is able to fathom or interfere with. On the other hand, this could just be the hopeless romantic inside of me.
Cuffing season should be whatever you make of it, but not something that should be weighing down on our conscious. I have multiple guy friends who are on the hunt for a girlfriend just so that they would not be left out during cuffing season. It almost seems to be a sort of manly competition as to which guys are able to get someone and which ones stay single during this time of year. It is not only a guy issue, however, as many of my girlfriends have been scoping out potential suitors just so they can have someone go to tree lighting ceremonies and drink hot chocolate with. Why do we feel the need to get into a relationship with someone just for the sake of not being lonely? Are we not content enough with ourselves that we have to find our worth in our ability to have a partner? What is so wrong with being a single and why do we not feel content spending time on my own?
The answers to these questions are simply food for thought. New Year’s is coming around the corner and is a perfect time to look inside of ourselves and figure out what we want out of life and who we truly are. At the end of the day, whether or not you have found a significant other during this cuffing season is pointless. If you have, congratulations, I hope you have a long and successful relationship. If you have not, do not sweat about it. Do not feel the need to settle for someone for the sake of being included. Wait until you find the right person who will make you smile, whether it is during this season or not. It is never the right or wrong time to get cuffed, but do it when it feels right. After all, dating is not everything. Spend some time discovering new passions or hanging out with your friends. Fall in love with yourself and get into a serious relationship with making yourself happy.