I walked in on the second day of class, ready to begin the search for a new course. After reading through the syllabus I realized there was a prerequisite class that I had not taken. I had no idea how I had made it into this class anyways. It’s only my second year of college and somehow I’ve found myself in 4000 level classes. It’s been a bit overwhelming to say the least.
When I brought this problem to the attention of my professor his reply was, “We’ll go ahead and wave it, you’ll be fine. You might just have to work a little bit harder.” This did not comfort me at all. Instead I was terrified. We’ve all had this kind of class. Where it takes 10 minutes to comprehend one page of the reading. Everyone else seems to understand the formula except for you. You’re looking up every other word the professor uses in his lectures just to decipher your notes.
When you come to college you realize there are a lot of people who are much smarter than you are. This can be extremely intimidating, especially in a classroom. Raising your hand to ask a question suddenly sounds worse than singing the national anthem at the Super Bowl. Everyone’s eyes are on you, and in a lecture hall of 200 people, that’s a lot. What if it’s a dumb question? What if people roll their eyes or giggle at you? What if you can’t even get the professor’s attention?
A fear that I’ve developed in college is the fear of looking stupid. In high school I was a high achieving student, which is the case for many of us who go on to attend a university. In college you are no longer recognized for every success. Instead you are challenged. Professors are here to teach you as much content as possible in a short amount of time. You are put into an environment with students who have had a wide variety of experiences, and in many cases are more well versed in a subject than you are. This shouldn’t scare us. Students should be celebrating the challenge, because it is an opportunity that is not offered to everyone. We just have to let go of the idea that we need to seem smart all time.
A professor once told my class, “It’s not about being the smartest person in the room, but attempting to be in the room.”
Being in the room means working hard, searching for answers, and truly being present for a class. So what if you get a C as your final grade? You may have learned a lot more than the person who got an A. Your education is the priority, and you should never let your fears keep you from that.
Recently I was looking through old letters and found a card my 6th grade teacher had given me. Inside she wrote, “Keep asking those wonderful questions next year and never settle for less.” I smiled as I remembered my sixth grade self. I always had my hand in the air, either to answer a question or to ask one. I was constantly curious and loved to read aloud to the class. I never gave a second thought as to what other people thought of me. All I knew was that I loved being in the classroom, absorbing as much information as possible.
So as I walk into my next lecture I remember the little girl who always asked questions. She’s still here, and she still has so much to learn.