My aunt started her first year of undergrad in the mid-1980s. When she was moving into her residence at Queen’s, she of course asked some of her new floor mates what degree they would be studying. The girls giggled, and replied they were “really only there for their MRS degree”.
So, what is an MRS degree? A marriage certificate.
Has the importance of finding “the one” in university changed since the mid 80’s? Absolutely. In 1981, the percentage of people who had never been married between the ages of 25, and 29 was 26% (Statistics Canada). In 2011, the percentage of those who had never married in that age group was 73% (Statistics Canada). Even men who had never been married in their early 30s jumped from 15% in 1981 to 54% in 2011 (Statistics Canada).
On that note, a survey by Askmen.com showed that 70% of men wanted to get married (Askmen.com). Just…not yet.
Why could this be? Marriage isn’t the main thing most students have in mind when entering university at the age of 17 or 18. It’s their first taste of freedom, so naturally students party in university! A study by the Canadian Association for Mental Health showed that Canadians were drinking more than 50% the global average (Huffington). Each year, the average individual drank 6.1L of alcohol per year in 2005, and increased to 10.9L per year (TCAMH). However, the percentage of alcohol consumption by 15-29 year olds decreased from 82.9% to 70.8% (TCAMH)! It’s easy to access when your school has a student bar. Toonies anyone?
When hooking up with a stranger, the excuse “I was really drunk” has been said many times. This isn’t necessarily the best way to find your soul mate. It is the culture arising from this party lifestyle. Media inflicts this on university students in so many ways, whether it’s through TV shows, magazines, or movies. The statistics show most men are not ready to marry early in life and take this opportunity to prioritize other things.
*Sidenote: The Drug, and Alcohol Helpline can provide information on rehabilitation, or intervention for someone you know, 1 800 565 8603
Of course you are in university primarily to get a degree to help start your career. More and more women are pursuing education so they may provide for themselves and don’t have to rely on anyone else financially. The University of Ottawa has a higher female enrollment than male, with over 21,000 female undergrads and 14,000 males. What does this tell us? It shows how more women are attracted to independence, and the ability to make decisions for their future. The most popular decision seems to be to jumpstart a career before throwing a man into the mix.
University students are enjoying their independence, but a relationship has steps before a ring is thrown into the picture; the first date, then the next few, becoming an “item”, and then moving in together (maybe?). Many couples will live together before anyone pops the question. Getting used to living with someone takes time (we’ve had do this with room mates, too). It’s a good idea to get used to someone’s daily routines, or habits if you think you could be living with them for a very long time. And even after graduation, many couples now wait until they are financially stable before putting a ring on it.
I’ve only ever been told (my aunt included, who completed her Political Science degree, snaps) that the years you spend in university will be some of the best of your life. Focus on the academics that are going to build your career – it is only what will help you get a job, or career after all! Join clubs, get volunteer experience, live on your own, and then reminisce on old memories with the friends you’ve kept. Be happy, and have the time of your life (and don’t forget to prioritize)!