Hey Holly!
I’ve been in a relationship for the past year now. We were the cutest lovebirds who never used to fight, but for the past three months all hell break loose in our relationship. We kept on arguing, fighting and I would spend most of my day/night crying. We had neither trust nor communication between us anymore. Anyways, yes I still love him, but I realized that I couldn’t continue being miserable. I called it quits about a week ago. Now, I am just wondering when is the right time to start dating again? I need to move on.
Thanks,
The girl who wants to be happy
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Dear Girl who want to be happy,
Let me be the first to say, you were completely right in breaking up with him because you were no longer happy. Between school, work, and life; you really do not need any more stress in your life. As to when is the right time to move on, there really isn’t a right answer. Socially, the rule of thumb is one month per year of dating. This approach should protect the other person’s feelings, and help you to avoid that rebound guy. Spiritually, this is a whole other matter. You need to rediscover your identity. What makes you happy?
Everyone has their own “break-up process”; some drink, some need a dirty hook-up or burn everything that has to do with that relationship. A good method to know when is the right time to start dating again is to start a project of some type and pour all your negative energy into it (i.e knit a scarf). Once that project is done, it is time to start dating again. What you do with the project afterwards is up to you- you could give away the scarf and it would symbolize letting go all of the negative energy from the relationship. My mother likes to say “it’s not the right moment but the right man, that’s when you move on”. When you are truly happy, then you will know the time is right to move on.
Good luck!
XO,
Holly
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