When you’re in a relationship, the last thing you want to think about is breaking up or going on a “break.” As soon as the word break is mentioned, we cringe and roll our eyes. Many of us don’t even believe in breaks; we may think they’re just excuses or just the beginning of the end. Yet, that isn’t always the case.
In movies we usually see the guy doing the breaking up, with cliché lines like, “we just need some time apart,” or my personal favorite, “it’s not you, its me.” We become so obsessed over how a break-up should be and who should end it, instead of why it’s ending. Break-ups aren’t always bad, and as much as we hate to admit it, sometimes breaks are necessary.
I don’t believe breaks should be used for recreational purposes, nothing like a hall pass in a relationship, or experiencing things that you couldn’t before. Breaks should be for re-evaluation, for space, and for realization. Although many people don’t believe in breaks, and don’t approve of them, it may be better to take a step back before losing someone you care about completely.
How could a break ever be good? A question widely asked. Some reasons include: if your relationship is on the rocks, if it may seem toxic, or if arguments and jealousy become an everyday thing and you’re just not sure about what you want. Then, it may be time to take a step back or to agree to both think things through completely. Toxic relationships are, of course, the worst kind to be in. Not only do they affect you and your partner, but even the people around you.
Being alone after being in a relationship can be heart wrenching and painful, but we should always look at the bright side of everything. A break can help you find yourself again, amd find out who you are without your significant other. You’ll pick up old hobbies again, like hanging out with your friends more often or finding something new that you like. You learn to be you all over again.
Space and time apart will help you re-evaluate your relationship, even if you were the one who wanted the break or not, during this time you need to focus on yourself and what you want. Is the relationship worth it? Do you still care about them? You come to realize the pros and cons of being together.
You also realize how much you miss them, or if you don’t miss them at all. You realize how awful you felt in the relationship, or how happy you were. You begin to think things through more clearly, realize what you want, and how you want them.
The toughest part of breaking-up is moving on, but it may also be getting back together. A lot may have changed over the time span of the break and it could either be beneficial or disastrous. If the break works out and you do get back together it could create a clean slate, and everything negative is left in the past. You’ll both realize what it was like to be without one another and thus want to be better individuals with each other, hopefully initating a stronger bond. Being together again, optimistically, means knowing what you want from one another and focusing on positive things. This works when both parties agree to move forward together.
Breaks don’t usually have a specific time span. For example, some couples stay apart for mere days or weeks, while others are apart for months. No one can tell you how you feel or what you should do; they can only give their opinions and insight. A relationship is made solidly of two people, and only those two people can determine how their future will play out.