1) I’m meeting my boyfriend’s parents for the first time this holiday season. How do I make sure they like me?
With break approaching, a new change in your relationship is about to happen. Meeting the family. Unless his dad is like Jack Nicholson in Meet the Parents or his mom thinks you’re the devil for taking her baby away, you don’t have to worry about anything. Honesty is the best policy. If your boyfriend likes you for who you are, he has probably conveyed that to his family in one way or another. If you show up putting on a front and act like someone you’re not, then it’s going to be painfully obvious.
The first impression can be your opportunity to set the tone for the rest of the first meeting. Dress sensibly; it’s cold, so wear something nice and obviously not too revealing. After all, it’s a family gathering, not Thursday night at The Pub. Naturally, your boyfriend will be introducing you to the family, and as you meet them, be sure to make solid eye contact with each person you meet. A smile and a handshake can take you anywhere in life. Just try to avoid making the first move with the mom-hug; if she wants to hug you, she’s going to do it. Once that’s all over with, get yourself settled in and relax.
The whole time your boyfriend has you home, he will most likely be more nervous than you. That being said; don’t let unnecessary stress come between you. He is under the pressure of making sure his family likes you, along with keeping you entertained. As far as making his parents like you, it’s simple. Don’t try to make them like you. If you’re polite, pleasant, and offer help with simple little things like cleaning up the table or doing the dishes, you’ll score points. A great icebreaker could be telling a joke or story involving your boyfriend, (keep it PG.) The embarrassing stories and photos he never wanted you to know of will come out so enjoy it. If you catch a moment drying off the dishes with his mom, go for it, that’s always an instant in. Bottom line: just be yourself. If they don’t like you as the real you, they probably won’t like you as someone else.
2) I have been hooking up with a guy for the past month. I’m nervous that going home for the holidays will ruin everything. How do I maintain that spark while we are apart for so long?
If you have been hooking up with someone for a month and you won’t see them for roughly a month, there are some unique challenges ahead. For both of you, making things work without seeing each other will be tough, but not impossible.
With vacation comes a month of relaxation and sadly, distance. You know you’re not going to see your hookup for a while, so don’t dwell on it. If you feel like you guys are leading towards something more serious, then that’s something you both need to discuss. Though there’s several things that could make him forget your one-month of passion, (a winter job, an ex,) you must decide whether or not to put work in maintaining contact with your hookup, and fast.
Luckily, in this day in age, we have never been so connected. If you want to chat, you’ve got a million ways to do it. Skype, Facebook, texting, tweeting, some people even still call each other… on the phone. I wish I could quote the old adage, “distance makes the heart grows fonder” and say that it’s always true, but then I would be lying. The fact of the matter is if things are going to keep going after break, they will. By keeping in touch and making plans for the next time you see each other, hopefully things will pick up where they left off.
3) I want to buy my boyfriend something special for the holidays. However, everything I can think of to buy him is so cliché. Is there anything most guys want but are too embarrassed to ask for?
The holidays are the best and the worst time of the year depending on how you look at it. The stress of pleasing everyone can be overwhelming. At the same time, getting presents and spending time with loved ones and old friends is enough to make life pretty good. One thing that can be problematic but shouldn’t be is buying gifts. If you’re giving someone a present out of the kindness of your heart, they should have no reason for disappointment. Still, there is a selfish side to the holiday season, and if you give a sub-par gift without taking the time to think about the recipient, you shouldn’t give one at all.
With no hesitation, I can comfortably say that I am impossible to shop for. My answer to “what do you want this year” is always “nothing.” This is because I’m a guy and if I want something, I get it. I don’t sit around waiting until after I don’t want it anymore. I’m impulsive and have money, put that together, and I get what I want. The best way to shop for someone like me is to be creative and pay close attention to the small details. Combination gifts, like an activity and something tangible always goes down well. Does your guy ski or snowboard? A ski pass and some new goggles are easy and by giving them you’ll spend together, doubling the value of the gift.
Clothes are always an option, but don’t get caught up in trying to find the right thing. If you see a nice jacket or sweater that you think he would look great in and it’s something you believe he would wear on his own, get it. You need to know what your boyfriend likes, uses, and doesn’t have. If he’s been chopping his face up with a disposable razor, get him a nice men’s shaving kit. Another great gift idea: anything edible, after all a way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.
You’ll never go wrong putting some thought into it, giving from the heart and let the holiday season work its magic. Cue the hug.