5 Signs You’ve Passed the Awkward Phase With Your Roommate

Roommates. Chances are you’ve had one — or several of them — if you’re in college. If you're like me and had your own room back home, being tossed into a tiny space made of painted cinder block walls with a complete stranger sleeping in a bed seven feet away from you is no easy transition. Despite what the Backstreet Boys may have said, I do care who you are and what you’ve done in your past, so I know you’re not a psycho murderer.

If and when you get over that awkward period where you feel pressured to make the bed every morning and wash your dishes immediately after using them in order for your roomie to not view you as a slob, things start changing.

First, it starts out with a few dirty forks being left on the desk for a day or two before you wash them. Next, you go a week without making the bed. Eventually the two of you become really close, so close you start to not care quite as much, if at all, what they think of you, since at this point you’re basically an old married couple. Here are some signs you and your roommate have passed the stage of uncomfortable “Hi, how was your day?” greetings when they come back from class, to “Thank God you’re back I was so freakin' lonely!”

1. No need to hide  

Got a weird habit you’ve been keeping a secret from your other friends? Well, once you and your roommate get really close, there can be virtually no boundaries. Go ahead, dance in your underwear like Callie from Grey’s Anatomy or eat an entire jar of peanut butter for dinner. After the awkward phase, nothing is embarrassing or weird anymore.

2. Gossip for days

When you first move in with someone, it can be really hard not being able to talk about the latest news you’ve heard around campus with them. Once you get past the casual talking though, the good stuff comes out. You and your roommate can probably stay up forever talking about the silliest gossip but it’ll only feel like a few minutes.

3. Hardcore teasing

Joking around with someone is pretty much guaranteed in a friendship, but after sharing a room for nine months with another person, the “joking” can become intense and might even sound way too harsh to people that don’t understand just how much you trust your roommate not to get offended. Even though I may tease and say I hate Kara and that she’s the worst roommate, I’d be first in line to beat up anyone that tried to mess with her for real.

4. Life stories

My roommate Kara and I were set up to be sophomore year roommates by a mutual friend. Turns out, Kara and I are basically the same exact person, so our living arrangement turned out better than I thought possible. At first, she and I would have very simple, friendly conversations, but that was about it. Now, we’ve gotten past the whole “cordial facade” and we’ve talked about our life stories, which includes some of the darkest and best parts of our lives. Hopefully you and your roommate click as well as we do and you’ll have a new person you can turn to, to talk about the things that are hard to share with any other friend.

5. You see each other at your best – and worst

A telltale sign that you and your roommate are past the awkward phase is being comfortable enough with one another to show all sides of you. Sometimes you’re feeling confident as hell and strutting your stuff, and other times you come back to the room feeling horrible and just need time alone — or at least just some silence. Close roommates are able to gauge each others' emotional status. After spending enough time with one another, you’ll know whether to strike up a conversation or give them some space by either leaving the room or just keeping to yourself until they’re ready to talk.

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Hi! I'm Dani and I'm an English major at UMass Amherst. Between studying and writing for Her Campus I love spending time with my friends, swimming, watching movies, and playing with my pup!

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