My freshman roommate story isn’t one that’s amazing with ‘love my froomie’ pictures or planning to live together for the next 3 years — it’s more of a jumbled mess. As the last few weeks of my first year at UD come to a close, I can’t help but think back on my dorm experience and how different it was from the norm.
Basically my year went in 4 stages:
Stage 1: Pre move-in
Once I committed to UD, I did the typical, “Hi I’m [name], I’m from [city, state], and I’m looking for a roommate. I’m into…” post like every other incoming freshman overly eager to be a college student in the fall. After talking to a few people, I met a girl who seemed super nice and we had a lot of things in common. Let’s call her Roommate 1. So Roommate 1 and I submitted the housing forms with adequate time to spare and requested a traditional double. Everything seemed to be going well.
Fast forward to mid-June or July when we received the housing assignment email. I was so excited, I left work early and checked my email multiple times to in the day until it popped up. Nervous, but assuring myself it would be fine probably in Harrington or smyth, I opened the email. Roommates: me, Roommate 1, Roommate 2. George Read triple.
Obviously I was perturbed: North Campus? A triple? Who was this random Roommate 2?
I messaged Roommate 1 our assignment and we both freaked out until I had to get back to work after my break. The next few days consisted of messaging the random Roommate 2. A nice girl from Delaware who did not share our religion, the most important thing my roommate and I were both looking for. A few weeks later we got our room assignment, the standard forced triple. And I asked for not the top bunk during my break. Before either responded, I had to get back to work and Roommate 1 decided she would take the single bed and Roommate 2 decided to take the bottom bunk, leaving me with the specific bed I had asked not to have. The same type of thing happened when I asked who wanted to get the fridge but that ended up being a good thing.
Stage 2: The Triple
My requested roommate and I moved in early and got along great for the first few nights. When our third roommate moved in, it was awkward at first as we had already met a few people and had a small and loose friend group, but she fit in well and we became close quickly. After the first month came and went, I slowly began to feel out of the loop with my roommates. They began to go to breakfast together without me, texted outside of our group chat and talked in hushed voices when I was around. After I started making friends outside of the floor, the hostility began.
It started with bedtime, we generally had similar schedules but sometimes I liked to stay up until midnight or one. They would wait expectantly for me to get ready for bed and be passive aggressive when I decided to go into the lounge until I was ready to sleep. Then there was the hallway where one of the desks in our overcrowded room sat. Roommate 2 began to move her things so that they would block the small walkway and make it impossible for me to not trip when I came in late at night. I was not able to use a flashlight as it caused them to groan and shout to turn it off.
Then there was the bed. From the day I moved in, I kept hitting my head on the ceiling while climbing onto my bed. I asked Roommate 2 if we could both move the beds down a notch because I kept hitting my head and it wasn’t safe because I had just recovered from 2 concussions. She said no. I decided to loft the bed instead and lower it.
Then came the issue of space. Even before having the bed lofted, my small corner of the room did not provide adequate storage. I could not leave anything except my suitcase under the bed because it was Roommate 2’s space. Once I lofted my bed over my desk and belongings, my space became smaller but Roommate 2 told me I had to put some of her things underneath my bed. I said no because she had her own underbed space as well as other areas. This did not go over well.
With tension building and an environment that I was not welcome in, I decided with my RA’s help that it was time to move.
Stage 3: The Single
After a grueling process of dealing with finding new roommates that resulted in dismal results and a meeting with DSS, I was able to be placed in a empty double in the same building. Now this was not a normal double, but a single with 2 beds, 2 wardrobes, 2 desks and no dressers. I was able to move in and was happy. My grades rose, I had a better social life and I was finally getting enough sleep.
Stage 4: The Double
Winter break was at an end and I was packed and ready to go for my flight the next day when I got an email from Residence Life and Housing. It said the vacancy in my room had been filled. I was able to contact the new roommate and start talking to her, only to find out she had already moved into the room.
When I returned to campus after break, I ended up not meeting her for over 48 hours. It turned out her schedule involved waking up at 5 am and going to bed at 8:30 pm. I am a self proclaimed night owl. She also happened to be very unhygienic. I get major anxiety when things are gross, like the floor being covered in hair or bodily fluids. We talked about it, she agreed to be cleaner, but never followed through. My RA told her the situation would not be good for either of us and recommended she try to move. She did not. My grades dipped once again but I stuck it out, which was a bad decision on my part.
Now here we are at the end of the year. I am not posting a ‘froomie’ pic on Insta and will not be eagerly waiting to live with the same roommate next year. My advice to anyone living in on campus housing with roommate problems that seem to not be resolved is take the scary leap and move. Your relationship with your roommates will most likely take a positive turn. I still see Roommate 1 and 2 on occasion and share a smile or wave while walking by. While I know there are others with worse roommate experiences, mine was not positive. I hope your housing ventures are fair better than mine.