“It’s going down, I’m yelling Tinder, you better move, you better dance.” I’m wide aware that the correct lyrics of the popular Ke$ha/Pitbull song are, “I’m yelling Timber,” but collegiettes, you’d be surprised to hear just how many times this Freudian slip has occurred.
In a world where most communication between friends and significant others occurs through the media, applications like Tinder, a hook-up match app, are thriving—- if that’s what you want to call it. Although I’m sure some people have actually succeeded in hooking up with their Tinder matches, for the most part, collegiettes use it for entertainment, both through swiping faces and for the crazy pick-up lines. This past week, I decided to ask your fellow Jumbos about the craziest pick-up lines that they have received through Tinder. Here’s what they had to say:
Let’s start with the freshmen…
Freshman guy:
I may not go down in history, but I’ll go down on you.
How academic of you…
Freshman girl:
I once got a Harry Potter one. Going to bed? Mind if I Slytherin?
I personally prefer Gryffindors, but hey, it’s creative.
And the sophomores…
Sophomore guy:
If I flip a coin, what are my chances of getting head?
That’s a whole new definition of “lay your chance on me.”
Sophomore girl:
Are your legs made of Nutella? Because I’d like to spread them!
I’ve always said that Nutella always makes everything better.
What’s up juniors?
Junior guy:
Do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.
Interesting…can you really though?! Maybe if I look harder, I’ll see you there too…or not.
Junior girl:
Hey, baby. Let’s play house. You can be the door, and I’ll slam you all night long.
Give me a “Do Not Disturb” sign, and I’ll be yours forever.
And finally, our seniors…
Senior guy:
Your name must be yogurt…cause I want to spoon you.
If only I could turn into yogurt…
Senior girl:
I’m having a backyard sale and clothes are 100% off.
That’s quite the offer. I’m always down for a good deal.
Well, there you have it Jumbos. They say that people are willing to take more risks when they’re not face-to-face, and in my experience with Tinder, I can assure you that that is true. The craziest pick-up line that I ever got was, “Screw me if I’m wrong, but you want to screw me, right?” Believe me, I was in shock at first, but with apps like Tinder, you just have to take it in stride. Feel free to block the users if they make you uncomfortable or just swipe left (as my good friends say), but if you’re looking to be amused, then go right ahead. So swipe away collegiettes, and just have a good time.
Swipe and stride on,
Tufts Love Guru
Picture from here.