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I’m 19, Korean-American, and Terrified

This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Texas chapter.

It’s a fact that many Americans are afraid of WW3 breaking out with North Korea, although the States probably wouldn’t be the first target if North Korea did attack.

To most Americans, North Korea is just a foreign country that’s far away but a possible threat to their safety.

 

But for me, it’s a completely different story.

North Korea isn’t a foreign country.

It’s a country that used to be one with South Korea.

It’s a country that many Koreans dream about re-uniting with.

 

“Hanna, try calling to your dad in Korea a bit more. Things seem different from previous threats,” was the first thing my mom said when I hopped into her car after not being able to see her for a few weeks.

Having to tell me what to do if a war breaks out in Korea, and telling me who to ask for help if “mom and dad both pass during the war” probably isn’t a normal conversation a mom would have with her 19-year-old daughter.

 

As a Korean-American, this whole situation with North Korea and nuclear weapons is chaotic, horrible, and terrifying.

 

And yes, it actually is affecting me.

 

Before talking about how I feel about Trump being immature and selfish, as always, and threatening to “totally destroy” North Korea, I would like to explain a bit of my background.

 

Nineteen years ago I was born in Athens, Georgia and lived a normal life; and though I knew I was Korean, because I was too young I didn’t really think much about it or have any knowledge or interest in Korea.

However, that all changed when my dad got a position at a university in Korea when I was in second grade.

Everything was so sudden, yet, despite my fears of not being accepted into the community or not being able to get used to the differences, I fell in love with Korea, the food, and the culture.

 

Korea became my home. Korea was now a part of me.

 

I still clearly remember the first time I had a panic attack after hearing the news that North Korea had conducted a nuclear test.

It was May 2009. I was living at my friend Allie’s house for about six months in Athens and was attending fifth grade at Timothy Road Elementary School.

I first heard about the news when I was talking to my mom, who was in Korea at the time, as she carefully informed me about what was happening there.

And yes, I freaked out.

I was bawling to the point where everyone in the house was trying to calm me down, and because I couldn’t talk through my crying, I had to let Allie and her family know what was happening by writing out words.

My hands were too shaky to write out full sentences.

I was in fifth grade.

I was 10.

 

Though there were many small and large threats from North Korea, I don’t think there was ever one this serious.

 

Am I scared?

No.

 

I’m terrified.

 

I’m terrified that a war might break out.

I’m terrified that a war might break out on the country I love so much.

I’m terrified that a war might break out and destroy the country and culture I love so much.

I’m terrified for my dad who lives in Korea.

I’m terrified for my grandparents.

I’m terrified for my cousins.

I’m terrified for my friends.

I’m terrified.

 

This feeling of fear had me wondering, do my friends in Korea feel the same way?

I live about 6,600 miles away from North Korea and feel this terrified.

How are my friends, who live five hours away from North Korea, coping with the thought that a war could happen any minute?

 

“Honestly, there’s nothing I can really do. I just have to live everyday like it’s a normal day. I can’t just be afraid and stay home all day worrying about a war breaking out. I have responsibilities. If a war breaks out then boom, there’s a war, and yes, of course I’m scared of dying, come on… I’m only 19. But there’s really nothing I can do at this moment.”

 

This is what my best friend in Korea, Haemin, said when I asked her how she’s doing with everything going on.

 

She’s a normal 19-year-old college student, and like many other Koreans living in Korea, she’s normalized the fear that she’s feeling.

Haemin and so many other Koreans have become numb about this whole situation.

 

Again, this whole situation is terrifying and Trump is not helping.

 

Instead of trying to peacefully solve the issue with North Korea, Trump is escalating his standoff with North Korea over its nuclear challenge.

He’s threatening to “totally destroy” the country and continues mocking Kim Jong Un, as “rocket man.”

 

Though I do not want to make this post political in any way, I do want to end this with a short note for Trump.

 

Dear Mr. Trump,

Please. Please.

Do not provoke or anger the leader of North Korea in any way.

Please stop crossing the line.

Please think about all the people.

Please think about my dad, my family, and my friends.

Please negotiate a settlement that would avoid war.

Thank you.

 

Hanna Chung.

Hanna is currently majoring in Journalism and minoring in Business and Asian American Studies. She is currently the Social Media Director and a Staff Writer for Her Campus Texas. After finding out that UT Austin's unofficial mascot, Matthew McConaughey, attended BTS's concert in Fort Worth, her goal is to run into Mr. McConaughey at the Communication building or ride the same elevator and have a full conversation with him about BTS. 
Grace is a Philosophy and Economics double major and a Government minor at the University of Texas at Austin. Most of her writing focuses on politics and civic engagement, characteristically intertwining her journalism with op-ed takes (usually nonpartisan; depends who you ask). Grace enjoys reading philosophy, reading and discussing politics, gushing over her dog, and painting in her spare time. As a true economics enthusiast, she also loves graphs.