All family gatherings are awkward, especially because you’re around family members you don’t see that often. You still get the “I remember when you were *puts hand low to the ground* THIS big!” remarks. But you also get thrust into political banter because you’re an ~adult~ now. These are questions you will probably get asked and you need to act amused when asked. Read them over break to avoid making eye contact with family members that could spark unwanted conversation.
1. How’s school going?
You want honesty? I’m drowning in work and have no time to make friends.
2. What’s your major again?
Becky, I have told you this at least five times and I know you don’t actually care.
3. So…how are your grades?
I think I’m passing one of my classes, so pretty good I guess!
4. Do you have a boyfriend yet?
…you will be asked this countless times and that will never change until you are married.
5. Have you heard of the Freshman 15? Maybe don’t take a roll with dinner tonight, sweetie.
Have you seen your body, uncle Tim?
6. Are you scared at Temple? Do you ever feel like you are going to get shot?
I’ve gotten used to falling asleep with gunshots and sirens going. It’s actually really relaxing now.
7. How many finals do you have once you get back? Are you prepared for them?
Can we just eat food instead of talking about tests? I JUST WANT TO EAT, CHERYL!
8. Are you coming home for Christmas?
Why would I give up free food and gifts for North Philly?
9. What do you do outside of class? Make any friends yet?
…as they look at you like you’re still your awkward 7th grade self with braces and glasses.
10. Have you been going to the gym like you said you would?
Does my body look like I have been going to the gym uncle Rob?
11. Have you started applying to any internships?
…as they clearly ignore your answer because they only asked so they could boast about how your Ivy League cousin scored an internship at the top accounting firm.
12. Have you spent a lot of money since being at college?
Does all my money to GrubHub and Postmates count?
13. Do you need any money for food or books?
Yes, yes , yes, and YES!
14. Do you have a job?
Does taking 18 credits count? No? Leave me alone, Sharon.
15. Do you get along with your roommates?
…as they look at you thinking you will have a horror story about how your roommates but actually you get along with them (most of the time at least).
16. What is your GPA?
How much do you make a year Uncle Jim? Lets not talk numbers.
17. Have you met any cute guys at school yet?
*thinks about that guy you made solid eye contact with that one time at Kappa*
18. When can we come visit you at school?
*thinks about how you haven’t cleaned your room since you moved in*
19. When do you plan on having kids?
I just moved out on my own and I still call my mom and ask her how to make pasta. Does it look like I should be having children Bob?
20. You aren’t drinking are you?
Water? YES, and plenty of it! *glances at empty wine glass in your hand*
And arguably the worst…
21. What are your plans after college?
Can I just enjoy my four years here before I think about actually living in the real world?
At least you get to stuff your face with food while you try to avoid these awkward questions. Good luck out there, Owls.