It is 2017, the second leg of the beginning of the 21st Century. Women can dress however they want and they deserve to be respected by men regardless of what they are wearing. Both of these statements are true. Women can wear what they want and they do deserve to be respected by men, regardless of what they are wearing. But, that doesn’t change how men will think of you, a woman, for wearing whatever you want. Don’t you have something deeper to offer than what is revealed by the plunge of your neckline? Aren’t you more than a girl in a tight dress? Don’t you want someone to see you and not your short skirt? We live in a world full of off-putting media that objectifies women, but go to any college town on the weekend and you will see young women objectifying themselves.
You can present yourself as the type of girl a man wants to take home to his parents or as the type of girl a man wants to take home, and you can’t have both. You can be noticed, or you can be noticed for what you are wearing. This extends further than just what you wear. It also deals with your behavior, what you say and how you present yourself in-person and on social media. No woman should ever have to face a life altering event due to what she is wearing, that is not what I am saying.
This has nothing to do with misogyny. Why would you want attention for what you look like? For the clothes you are—or in some cases aren’t—wearing? You are a human being with thoughts, passions and a purpose. You deserve someone with the best intentions. Behaving modestly has nothing to do with bowing down to men. It has to do with loving yourself. When you love yourself, you refuse to allow your looks and your body to be your greatest asset. Loving yourself and respecting yourself go hand in hand. You deserve someone who notices your freckles not your cleavage. Someone who wants to know more about you, rather than wanting to take your clothes off. It is easy to be attracted to someone for what they look like, that is basic human nature. Sometimes it is hard to separate how we feel from what we deserve.
In the age of objectifying Instagram accounts that girls so desperately want to be on like TFM Girls and Old Row, there is something beautiful about modesty.
You want to be different than everyone else? Be modest. Walk into any bar, a girl in a low-cut shirt is a dime a dozen, but I am willing to bet you have at least a dozen unique qualities that none of those girls have. Find your worth in things that do not involve receiving male attention. Who cares if no one second looks you in a bar on a Friday night because you aren’t wearing a revealing outfit? Those looks were never the ones you wanted anyways.