I’ll be the first person to admit it: I was terrified to leave high school behind. I had an amazing group of friends, knew my way around the school, and participated in tons of activities. I thought the world would end when I walked across the stage at graduation. Of course, I couldn’t have been any more wrong. As soon as I met my “second family” at school, I couldn’t even remember what I’d been so scared of.
College is about getting your degree, but there’s so much more to it than that. There are infinite weekends to have fun, 3 am breakdowns when you’re sure you can’t take it anymore, meetings to attend, clubs to join, and holidays to celebrate. You need people to share those things with. You need your college family.
When you’re away at school, the people you choose to surround yourself with become more than just your friends. When I say you do everything together, I mean you do EVERYTHING together. You study together, you eat dinner together, you take naps together, you laugh together and you cry together. And the best part is: they’ll love you through all of it.
If you’re anything like I was last year, then you’re terrified of what’s going to happen during your first year of college. Myself and several of my “family members” are here to tell you that everything will be okay. Things might change for you, but most likely they’ll change for the better. Before you know it, you’ll find yourself in your own college family, and you’ll be wondering what you were so afraid of.
Freshman Interviewees & Majors:
Rachel Seamans (RS): Psychology
Jake Clark (JC): History Education
Gina Coldren (GC): Biochemistry
Kristopher Kell (KK): Sociology
Nick Bohn (NB): Engineering
Catie Schollaert (CS): Communication
Bobby Wynn (BW): English Education
Ashley Krause (AK): Biology
1. What’s one word you would use to describe the friends you’ve made in college?
RS: Caring
JC: Genuine
GC: Dependable
KK: Accepting
NB: Fun-loving
CS: Interesting
BW: Family
AK: Irreplacable
2. Did you have a large group of friends in high school or were you happy with just a few close friends? And did that change when you came to SVC?
RS: I had very few close friends in high school, going to a small school left us with limited options for friends but since coming to SVC, I have found that my friend group is much larger than I ever imagined
JC: Only had a few in HS, now I have many.
GC: I had a pretty large group of friends in high school. That didn’t change much at Saint Vincent, but now my group is even bigger.
KK: In high school I pretty much ran with the same 4 or 5 friends. It definitely changed when I came to college. I have a lot more friends now and because of different activities it’s a much more diverse group.
NB: I was friends with the majority, but still had a close knit best friend group.
CS: I only had a few really close friends in high school that I still keep in contact with, but now, at SVC, I have a lot more friends and they are practically family, even though I literally met them a few months ago. But I couldn’t ask for anything better.
BW: I had maybe one friend in high school and was always that kid who got bullied. I came here and have not been picked on and made about 20 good friends in my pod the first few hours. I went from so few friends to a lot.
AK: I was friends with almost everyone in high school, but I had a tight group of 6 girls I spent most of my time with. Here at svc, I consider everyone to be my friend too and similarly to high school I’m closer with certain groups of people.
3. Are the friends you’ve made similar to you, different from you, or a mix of both?
They all agreed that their friends are definitely a mixed group. Rachel and Ashley both think that these differences are essential; for Catie, the similarities and differences “bring out the more outgoing side of [her], but are also a reminder to remain true to [herself] and stay kind. Really, what more could anyone ask for?
The most important thing to remember in college is that “different” isn’t a bad thing. You can still be yourself, or you might change entirely. The beauty of it is that you won’t know until you get there. Take comfort in getting close to people who are completely different from you. Take comfort in getting close to people who are the exact same as you. College is your chance to grow as a person, and doing it with friends is always more fun.
4. Did you become close with your new friends faster than you anticipated?
RS: I became friends with everyone way faster than I anticipated. I guess living in the same building with people and not really knowing anyone forces you to form friendships quickly.
JC: Waaaaaay faster than I ever would have thought.
GC: Yes. I opened up to my new friends faster than I ever expected to. Usually it takes some time for me to be completely comfortable with people, but this felt natural.
KK: Faster I’d say, I feel like living with everyone definitely made it a faster process.
NB: Yes, much faster than I thought I would.
CS: Oh without a doubt! Within the first month of college, I met so many new people and became really close with them rather quickly. I thought it would take at least a semester before I finally found friends that I could confide in, but it only took 2 months before that happened.
BW: A lot closer than I thought. I figured college was going to be like high school and I’d be on my own most of the time.
AK: Yes! Much faster. At first, it took me a while to adjust to college and branch out to make new friends, but once I met this group, we clicked instantly. I can’t imagine my life without them now.
5. A lot of people say their college friends are more like a second family. Do you feel this way? Why or why not?
RS: I definitely feel like my friends are like a second family. [My friends] are the first people I would come to with any problem or good news. It’s hard going a day, let alone a week, without talking to them.
JC: Most definitely. I see them every day, I eat with them… they don’t feel like a second family, they feel like family.
GC: Yes. My friends at school interact with each other like brothers and sisters. We bicker and argue, but we care so much for one another and do whatever we can to make each other laugh. I can count on any of my friends without a doubt, and I trust them like a family. I know that if I need anything at all, I’ll have a huge group of support and love behind me, just like a family.
KK: It definitely feels like a second family. Everyone is super different but I feel like everyone is there for each other and is really supportive regardless of what happens.
NB: Yes, because when you’re forced to live with people in a pod you get very close
CS: My college friends really are my second family. I think it’s because we were all thrown into an entirely different lifestyle, and even though we all come from different backgrounds, we found comfort knowing we weren’t the only ones thrown into the new life known as college. We’re going through all of these new experiences together and we’ve got each other’s backs, which isn’t something you usually get at a big school, such as Pitt or Penn State. We’re there for each other, just like a family should be.
BW: Easily my second family. Between the hockey team, my pod, and all my other friends it’s like a giant family. Everyone looks out for each other and it’s a great feeling.
AK: For sure!! The 5th floor of Benny is like one big happy family. We hang out all the time & even have GroupMe which has brought us closer. We’re constantly joking around, and it’s always a good time.
I can still hear my roommate’s mom’s voice when she looked at me on move-in day and said “this could be where you meet your future bridesmaids.” Boy, if she only knew. I’ve not only met my future bridesmaids, I’ve met the sisters I never had, the “annoying” brothers who make fun of me but would still do anything for me, the shoulders to cry on that I never expected to have, and the BEST friends I could ask for.
So, if you’re scared of the future the way I used to be: don’t worry. You’ll find your family before you know it, and they’ll be one of the best things that ever happens to you. To my interviewees (and the rest of my “family”): thank you.