In the latest scandal of 2018, snapchat has inflicted it’s new update upon the world. As a reaction to this assault on the eyes, I’d like to take us back through the years in a sort of “aesthetic memorial of days gone by.”
From the beginning, Snapchat was set up to be a success. Its use was entirely intuitive, its design flawlessly simple. The clean lines, almost entirely white background, and one username now serving as something of a novelty.
Alas, good things were not meant to last, for it was time for the introduction of emojis. The nightmare had begun. We all moved to quickly memorise what each face meant in relation to the person receiving our photographs to ensure no offence could be inflicted by accident. Lives were simultaneously being ruined by the ‘streak’ feature, one particular prominent memory of mine being a trip to an internetless camping ground which ended in the termination of a 120 day streak and one very close friendship.
Complicated social relations were becoming more difficult to keep track of, a situation only worsened by the presence of the Best Friends feature. Yes, that make or break, see who’s cheating on who feature. I digress, the emoji feature was one that led me to the conclusion that emoji must have bought in to the globally renowned media company and I was disappointed but remained understanding. This only made things ten times worse when I moved to confirm this suspicion and it turned out that Snapchat paid for emoji.
With the best friends feature removed we could all breathe a sigh of relief, or a sigh of disappointment? Its difficult to tell with this one. Little did we know, snapchat had plans to take things to the next level of creepy with the introduction of the snapchat map feature, famous for revealing when your friends are having a party without you. Thanks Snapchat.
This was it, Snapchat was permeating into every aspect of out lives. But the tables had turned, Facebook was returning with a vengeance. Snapchat’s cannibalistic twin was revealing features of her own, that took imitation as a form of flattery to a whole new level. In what can only be explained as a momentary lapse in judgement in a second of panic this new update was unleashed:
Snapchat my friend, your time is certainly ending; for less is certainly more.