As my freshman year of college is coming to an end and I realize that I’m slowly entering the adult world, there’s a lot of pressure to find a partner. I have many friends who are finding people and starting romantic relationships, getting engaged, and some even getting married. Even though in the grand scheme of things I’m still very young and have lots of time to start my own relationships, it’s hard not to feel pressured, or even left out at times. However, after a lot of beating myself up over the issue, I realized one very important thing: I need to love myself first. I need to be in a happy relationship with myself before I can do that with anyone else. So with that being said, here are 3 reasons why you need to love yourself first.
1. You are Beautiful Inside and Out, No Matter What Anyone Says
Obviously physical attraction is a factor one must consider in pursuing a partner, but if you’re focused on looking a certain way to attract other people, and it’s not making you happy and comfortable, something needs to change. In a media-based society it’s easy to get caught up in what others perceive to be the “norm” of attractiveness. However, all human beings are unique, and focusing too much time and energy on fitting a mold can be exhausting. So, if no one has told you yet today and you find yourself reading this, I just want to say that you are beautiful. From your kind and exciting personality, to your beautiful face and physique, everything about you is made correctly and wonderfully. Don’t let anybody’s perceptions of what you think you should look like influence you, just keep doing what you are doing, because you are enough.
2. Being Happy as an Individual Should Come First and Foremost
Obviously the thought of being committed to someone else and sharing memories and potentially a life with them can be amazing, but it’s important and crucial to first think of your own happiness and the joy you find in being yourself. Being single or feeling lonely can really get people down sometimes, but it is important to remember all the happiness a life committed to yourself has to offer. You’re not selfish for first attempting to seek happiness on your own. Everyone has a right in their lives to find what makes them happy. Whether it’s a hobby, your career, playing a sport, or anything mentally/emotionally beneficial to you, keep doing that if you find joy in it. Find what satisfies your needs in a positive way and remember that when those feelings of loneliness set in.
3. Relationships Come and Go, But You Have Yourself Forever
The world is filled with about 7 billion people, making the phrase “there are plenty of fish in the sea” quite accurate. In this heavily populated world, in the end, people are often looking for just one other person to be with romantically. It’s almost a guarantee that there are options out there for who and whatever types of people you are attracted to. This being, people are getting together and breaking up all the time. Couples break up, make up, stay broken up, and get together every day. When looking at the big picture of all this, you may not have the person you’re with right now, or who you will be with in the future forever, due to about a million different circumstances, but the one person you will always have in your life is yourself. It’s important to remember no matter what happens in your love life, you will always have your own life, so focus on what’s best for you and your own feelings in the long term. Your life and feelings are too precious to be taken for granted or overlooked, so just remember no matter who comes into or walks out of your life, you will always have the amazing you.
I hope this helped a little bit in allowing you to realize your worth and potential. It’s our duty to ourselves to make sure that we’re happy and taken care of. You don’t have to be in a committed relationship in order to feel like your life is in the right place and that you’re lovable. Everyone is worthy of love and happiness, but we must first find it in ourselves. Don’t feel discouraged or give up hope just because you’re single now. The time will come when you find who is right for you, but for now focus on being committed to you, and, of course, loving yourself.