The moment
When your body shakes,
Your heart beats out of your chest,
Your hands cry in fear.
When your mouth wants to scream,
But not a single sound is heard
And you’re too afraid to speak out,
Too afraid to not obey.
When all you can do is satisfy
As quickly as possible,
So you can get the hell out
To rush home and tell everyone no one.
After washing my body
To erase the taste of him off my skin,
I drank every last drop
To erase the memories from my head.
I laid there on my bed
Regretting every moment of that night.
As tears run down my cheeks,
I pray something will bring me to sleep.
The next morning,
When my best friend asked how I was,
I had to utter the ultimate lie,
“I’m fine.”
I wish I wasn’t so afraid that night.
Maybe I would have spoken up.
Maybe I would have just walked out.
Maybe, maybe, maybe.