Sunday night, one of my roommates hosted a sex toy party from Pure Romance. I’m not sure about you, but I have never been to a sex toy party, so I wasn’t sure what to expect. Whatever it was that I was expecting definitely did not happen.
Like any normal party, my roommate bought several boxes of wine and everyone brought appetizers. I knew this would be the type of party where you need a little liquid courage to come out of your shell, so I filled my cup liberally. I am by no means a prude when it comes to talking about sex or masturbation, but I have never displayed my black bag of tricks to all of my friends. It was a little unnerving and a lot personal.
The party started at 7 o’clock, and at 6:30 sharp, the lady from Pure Romance and her assistant rolled up in a mid-sized SUV full of naughty bits. She hauled three large, inconspicuous black boxes into our house and immediately started setting up her extravagantly pink display.
When the guests arrived, the house was buzzing with excited chatter; these girls were not nervous at all! There were enough college women to fill both my dining and living rooms, and not one seemed to reserve her excitement at the towering display of dildos.
Note: The hosts from Pure Romance will not start the party if there are any men or children present. I think this is a good rule of thumb. I wouldn’t mind if there were men present, but I know some people would. This is supposed to be a safe environment to talk about the freakiest sh*t you can think of.
The Pure Romance woman got straight to the point: “Here we have our newest, most popular model, which has ten speeds and does back flips.” (Maybe it doesn’t do gymnastics, but it does just about everything else.) Everyone oohed and ahhed, and the toy was passed around the room like it was show-and-tell.
This went on until all the toys in her magic black box had been presented. It was oddly business-like; each woman slowly inspected each toy without giggles or nervous laughter, gave their experienced opinion, and passed it on. I saw a few girls pretend to violate each other, but it was all in good fun. (Those girls were my roommate and I. We are children.)
I had to leave the party to go to my weekly Her Campus meeting for a bit, and when I came back the environment had changed immensely. Only a few people were left, my roommate had eaten about a pound of edible lubricants while I was gone, and the party had made over $500 in revenue. It was a success.
I am still not really sure what I was expecting. I think it was the brazen manner in which women I had never met before spoke to me about their sex toy preferences that caught me off-guard. My friends and I are very open about masturbation, but it isn’t generally a topic I bring up with strangers. (“What did you do this weekend?” “Oh, you know, bought a new vibrator, tried that out for a bit – the usual.”)
But why shouldn’t we talk about it? What is there to be so embarrassed of? We all do it, and we all know you do it, too. So let’s all stop being so bashful and start being more open about our sexual health. It is healthy, after all, and it helps to know you have nothing to be ashamed of. If you talk about sex with your friends, why is it so much more awkward to talk about masturbating?
Sex toy parties are a great way to realize how silly it is to be shy about this subject. Everyone comes in knowing that the other attendees are looking for a good time by themselves, and it creates an odd sort of bond among those present. You aren’t as afraid to ask people you have known for five minutes invasive questions like, “Have you done this before? What was it like? Did it feel good?”
I’m calling for a sex toy revolution. I’m not saying you need to whip your vibrators out in public and start screaming words like “dildo” and “c-ring” in people’s faces, but we do need more education about masturbation. A few of my friends have taken classes such as Psychology of Sex and things of that order, and these classes do talk about masturbation, but in a very awkward, dated way. It’s 2013 – we don’t want to see hand drawn pictures of guys from the 1970s that look like Jesus masturbating. Having a sex toy party should not be as taboo as it is. As my roommate likes to say, it’s the gift that keeps on giving. So what will you be gifting yourself?
Photo Credit here.