Out of all the ridiculous things I have done this semester, my proudest moment is probably when I went to go see Titanic 3D on a Saturday afternoon. Alone.
I had wanted to see the movie since I found out about its re-release last year, however, since most of the people I hang out with have a penis I was having a very difficult time finding someone to come with me. Now, I’m no stranger to going to movies alone. In fact, it’s one of my favorite things to do. In this particular circumstance, I totally should have just waited for someone to break down and go with me.
So I got to the movies and was already totally embarrassed when I bought my ticket/small popcorn/soda combo. I ended up knowing the girl behind the counter, who already thinks I’m a total assh***, and now here I am, buying a ticket to see Titanic 3D with no one in tow. But I brushed it off and assured myself that this movie would be totally worth the small embarrassment of that moment.
Oh boy, was I wrong.
20 minutes into the movie I was already crying. You know, that scene when Jack talks Rose off the ledge? Literally? It was all over for me. He tells her to never let go and she never does. After the first hour, I was sobbing. On top of the beautiful and timeless romance of Jack and Rose, there was also the tragedy of the Titanic that got to me.
People were just dying everywhere, these people would never be able to be requited lovers, guys were jumping ship and the captain went down with the boat. Those guys played their string instruments until the very end and I was just totally losing it.
Have I mentioned I have seen this movie close to 10 times?
For whatever reason, this particular viewing just had me completely hysterical. All I kept thinking to myself was that I will never know that crazy love that Jack and Rose experienced. I will never value any boy so much that I would freeze to death for him, and no boy will ever value me so much that he would freeze to death for me.
I was really hung up on the whole freezing water thing, obviously.
So of course, after the movie was over I recycled my 3D glasses and scurried to my car, where I promptly checked my makeup in the mirror. It looked like I had just walked out of a funeral. My face was covered in eyeliner/mascara. “All the more reason for no one to freeze to death for me” was naturally my first thought.
So this Titanic Depression plagued me for about a week. Titanic was all I could think about, talk about- I even had a dream about it. I kept thinking about alternate endings to the tragedy. What if the Titanic hadn’t sunk, and all those people had survived and Jack and Rose were able to be together.
But let’s get real here: Jack and Rose never would have worked out once they stepped off the ship. Think about it. Jack is this rambling man, and Rose is a poor little rich girl. They would have gotten hitched, and then she totally would have resented him after about 15 years of marriage. He would have kept her from being the rambling woman she wanted to be after meeting him on the Titanic.
Jack might have left her after they moved to some farm in Midwestern America. He probably would have found another beautiful girl to draw naked and that would have been the end of that. On top of that, Rose wasn’t even really in love with the guy. She was in love with the idea of freedom.
I know that’s me ruining a beautiful love story for myself. And that I’m also being a neurotic psycho by even thinking about any of that. But hey- it’s better than contemplating freezing to death. I think.