Most of us have been there. And if you haven’t yet, you most likely will. No I’m not talking about that new cool club or the top of Spencer’s Butte, I’m talking about the rebound relationship. No matter what side of the rebound relationship you’re on, it has its pros and cons. No matter what side you are on, you need to know what you’re getting into.
How to tell if you are the rebound girl
To really tell if the relationship you’re in is a rebound relationship, take a step back and look at how you two interact. Did you guy get together really fast? Did he just get out of a relationship not too long ago? Does he bring up his ex more than most people? Is he constantly trying to show you off? If so, you might be his rebound relationship. Don’t get down on yourself; there isn’t anything wrong with this
situation. If you’re okay with being the rebound girl, and nothing more, it can be fun! You just need to be honest with yourself that it’s not going to go anywhere serious, and sometimes in college that isn’t a bad thing
If you are the rebound
Sometimes we get ourselves into situations where we think the guy we’re seeing is truly into us. He’s cute, you have similar interests, but something just isn’t right. If you’re okay with being the rebound, go with it. College is a time for us to not be serious. You just need to make sure you never try and force it to be something it’s not.
If you aren’t okay with being the rebound, you need to end it before you get too involved. Remember to let him down easy. He probably jumped into a relationship with you because there is something missing for him. The last thing you want to do is hurt him more because in the long run, that might hurt you too. You obviously cared about him so make sure to tell him exactly why you have to end
If you have a rebound
As females we are bound to think without acting, sometimes we follow our heart instead of our head. And a lot of the time that following our heart leads us into a relationships with a boy. After getting out of a relationship and into a new one too quickly, you might be jumping in to a rebound relationship. If you find yourself constantly thinking about your ex, or comparing your new guy to your ex, there’s
a good chance he’s just a rebound. If you find yourself in a rebound relationship, be careful of committing before you’re ready. Most rebounds will not turn into fulfilling, successful relationships, so take it slow and make sure both parties know what they’re getting into.
There is the possibility that you are using your new rebound relationship to try and help yourself get over your ex. Make sure you allow yourself time to heal and find yourself instead of completely relying on someone else for your happiness. The only way to really be “okay” and ready for another real relationship is to be happy on your own. If you don’t get back to 100% on your own, without a man by your side, you may jump into relationships with the same faults as your previous ones and continue to make the same mistakes.
I have been on both sides of a rebound relationship. Not everything about them is bad, but certainly not everything about them is good. The most important thing you need to remember is to be honest. As long as you're honest with yourself and your partner, it could be a nice break to have someone there with you while you’re moving. Great memories could be made! You just need to make sure that
you’re relying on yourself to get stronger, rather than the other person.
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Maggie Hilty is a junior at the University of Oregon working towards a degree in Public Relations and Communication. She looks forward to traveling as much as possible after graduation, and then looking for a job in event and product promotion. Originally from Portland, OR, Maggie enjoys escaping up there when she can to be with family and friends, as well as finding any weekend she can to get to the beach. She loves being outside in the sun (when it comes out in Eugene), painting, and just getting to hang out with her friends. Follow Maggie on Twitter at @mahilty.