*** DISCLAIMER: Please be aware that the opinions in this piece do not reflect the official stance and views of Her Campus, Her Campus Oklahoma nor The University of Oklahoma.***
Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash
Use our preferred pronouns
It’s not that hard to use a person’s preferred pronouns. Refusing to use a person’s preferred pronouns is dehumanizing and hurtful. Specifically, if someone wishes to use they/them pronouns, do not respond with, “They/them? But you’re not multiple people. Why would I use those pronouns? It doesn’t make sense!”
Well, buttercup, imagine you’re on a date and throughout the entire evening, they refer to you by the wrong name. Even when you corrected them, they still refused to use your actual name. Wouldn’t that make you feel bad? Now you understand how it feels when people purposely misgender you.
Don’t ask us about our genitals
If someone tells you that they are trans or gender nonconforming, the incorrect response is, “But you have male/female genitals?” A person’s gender identity is not synonymous with their genitalia. Women can have penises and men can have vaginas. The same goes for those of us who fall outside the gender binary. In short, our genitals are none of your damn business.
Educate yourself
The best way to combat ignorance is through education. If you have questions about how to address people who are gender nonconforming and/or trans, or even questions about what their gender identity means, just ask! Asking questions and making a point to learn about us makes us feel welcome and accepted.
Go through LGBTQ Ally training
The OU Gender & Equality center offers multiple LGBTQ Ally trainings a year. This is an excellent opportunity to educate yourself and to help make campus a more inclusive place for everyone.
Advocate for more gender neutral bathrooms on campus
While this is an issue we’ve made progress in, there are still many buildings on campus without a gender neutral restroom.
I cannot stress enough how horrifying it is to be rushing to your next class and having to hold your pee for another 75 minutes, because the building you are in does not have a bathroom for your gender.
Use respectful language when discussing gender ambiguity in a classroom setting
This is probably the most frustrating thing I have experienced during college. I can’t even tell you how many anthropology discussions over gender have left me ready to fist fight the entire class. When you are in a public (or private) setting, it is so important to speak about people in the polite and socially acceptable terms. This comes back to my point about using our proper pronouns: if you feel like the terminology you use or your opinion might be hurtful to LGBTQ students, just keep it to yourself.
If an LGBTQ student says that language used in a class discussion was harmful or hurtful, use this as a learning moment. This campus belongs to all of us, and no matter our gender identity, we should all be treated with respect and kindness.
SaveSave