China; the country where everything is illegal, and legal at the same time. Even that definition doesn’t really do justice to the contradicting wonders this country has to offer. For the duration of my time there I was based in Yangshou, a picturesque town in Guangxi province, not yet fully tarnished by commercialisation from its rapidly emerging tourist industry. In between naming children and being overwhelmed by breath-taking scenery, the kindness of strangers and the lack of Facebook, I can honestly say I’ve had some of the best weeks of my life. There are a few things I probably would have cared to have known beforehand though. So, here are some tips from my experiences to help you survive your time in the Orient:
– Embrace the squat: It’s inevitable, no matter how long you may manage to avoid it (and believe me, some tried), you will eventually have to face the call of nature without the comfort of a toilet seat. The sooner you go native, the better. The last of our group to succumb found herself a full convert to the Chinese way of relieving yourself, praising the hygienic benefits. So there you go!
– Play Chinese drinking games: Surprisingly good, and a refreshing alternative to Beer Pong and Ring of Fire. Not so good when played with skinny 15 year olds mind who decide to projectile vomit on the hostel staircase.
– Listen. I know that such a tip could come across as incredibly patronising, but really, do. No matter what your opinion on the current political system being practised, you’re guaranteed a new perspective from the beliefs of locals, students, ex pats and the like. Except for when on Public transport (see below), the Chinese are friendly, friendly people!
– An A- just won’t cut it. If you’re ever planning on teaching English in China, nothing but an A will do. This is handy knowledge if you wish to avoid an apocalyptic breakdown of order in the classroom when you dare to hand out a couple of Bs.
– The street BBQs. Every subliminally engrained element of health and safety inside of you will be squirming at the thought but honestly, my only regret is that I didn’t get into this slightly healthy post-lash food quicker. Nothing soaks up tequila quite like spiced broccoli, fact. Apart from maybe the pig’s testicle, but I’m pretty sure I’ll still pass on that.
– If you want to make friends, don’t use public transport. If you thought the Underground was tough, it really is a dog eat dog (geddit?) world out there. In between this and the anarchy of the main roads, where the only general rule seemed to be ‘beep to overtake’ , that Tuc Tuc or Taxi might cost you an extra RMB or two, but it’s definitely worth it. Saying that, if you’re feeling more adventurous, a motorbike taxi is a fun alternative!
– Haggle. Girls, if you want that beautiful dress, be prepared to engage your stealthy side. You’re kind of expected to haggle and as such the price you’re often offered for an item initially will be double or even triple what locals would pay. You may feel a bit mean considering the majority of it is a tenth of what Topshop would charge, but if done with humour, its well-received (and rewarded!).
– Early mornings are your friend. It’s the coolest time of day, so if you want to exercise, or climb that mountain, now’s the time to do it. The alarm at four in the morning wasn’t welcome, the view of sunrise from the top of a mountain nicknamed ‘TV Tower’ was.
– Additionally, embrace the midday siesta. This will give you more energy for later when tequilas and street BBQs begin to make an appearance…
– And finally… clichéd, but say yes to as many opportunities as possible. A local offering a slightly off the beaten track tour? Say YOLO, and risk it. You’re feeling tired, but know there’s a group heading down to the river? Sleep when you’re dead and join the fun! No one else free to go on that Rice Terrace trip with you? Brave it alone. Obviously know your limit, but don’t be afraid to challenge it first before establishing it…
After all, isn’t that what travelling is all about?