Politics:
• THE SHUTDOWN IS OVER!: As of a few minutes after midnight on October 17, 2013, Washington, D.C. finally announced the welcome news that the historic government shutdown was finally over after members of both parties came together to pass a bill that ended the 16-day shutdown… for a few months, at least. The bill only authorized government spending until January 15, 2014, and the debt cushion will only last until February 7, 2014, so don’t worry: you’ll have a few months to forget why you lost all faith in the federal government in the first place before you have to once again continue complaining about the “do-nothing Congress” at the start of the New Year!(P.S. According to several polls, basically everyone- Congressional Democrats and Republicans, as well as the President- was a loser in this political game of chicken, but Tea Party Republicans emerged from the shutdown as Public Enemy #1… better luck next time, Ted Cruz!)
• MAYOR SENATOR CORY BOOKER WINS SPECIAL ELECTION: After the late Senator Frank Lautenberg passed away earlier this year, New Jersey held a special election on October 16, which named Democratic Newark Mayor Cory Booker the state’s first African American representative in the U.S. Senate! As a proud liberal Jersey Girl myself, I’d just like to wish my new Senator the best of luck in D.C., especially now that Congress is suffering from a serious partisan gap and record-
breaking low public approval ratings.
World News:
• GAY PRIDE IS INFECTIOUS: Despite Russia’s recent passage of severely anti-LGBT laws, many other nations across the globe seem to be warming up to the idea of legalizing gay marriage. Most recently, a Columbian judge threw out a case that challenged the legality of a female couple’s same-sex marriage. He said the courts should be used as a mechanism not to “deny rights, but rather a way to recognize them.” The couple remained legally married and the LGBT community in Columbia (and the rest of the world) rejoiced at their latest legal victory.
• TALKS WITH IRAN WERE… PROMISING?!: For the first time in decades, Iran willingly engaged in global talks this week in Switzerland, and leaders from Iran and the six other participating world powers all voiced their belief that the talks were productive and “forward-looking.” It seems that Iran’s new president, Hassan Rouhani, is willing to negotiate with world leaders regarding Iran’s nuclear ambitions, which would be a huge (and welcome) departure from the country’s previous strict pro-nuclear, anti-U.S. attitude. …World Peace, I haven’t given up on you just yet! (Now if only Kim Jong-Un could take a page from President Rouhani’s playbook.)
• “HARRY STYLES” IS NOW A DESTINATION: In this week’s arguably most amusing story, New Zealand’s third largest island, currently named Stewart Island, is set to be renamed Harry Styles Island after the country’s most obsessed loyal Directioners dominated the results of a nation-wide poll regarding the island’s new name…If it were up to me, I’d be more likely to plan for all of my future vacations to take place on New Zealand’s third largest island if it were renamed Ed Sheeran Island.
[Boston] Sports:
• THE WORLD SERIES IS FAST APPROACHING: With the MLB World Series set to begin on October 23, the Cardinals have won 3 games to the Dodgers’ 2 (in the NLCS), and the Red Sox and Tigers have each won two games (in the ALCS). Here at Northeastern University, there’s a notable increase in Red Sox apparel on campus, and most of us (aka everyone who isn’t from Detroit, LA, or St. Louis) are rooting for an eventual Red Sox victory in the World Series. #BostonStrong
• YAY, PATS! LET’S GO, CELTICS! HIP HIP HURRAY, BRUINS!: …Okay, I admit that I have nothing even remotely witty or knowledgeable to say about any sport other than baseball, so here’s what the internet says: The New England Patriots are 5-1, 1st in AFC Eastern Division. Their next game is at 1pm this Sunday, October 20, against the Jets. The Boston Celtics are scheduled to play their first game against the Raptors at 7pm on Wednesday, October 30. The Boston Bruins are 3-2, 5th against the Red Wings (3-2) and won an October 12 game against the Blue Jackets (3-1). Their next game is at 7:30pm on Thursday, October 17, against the Panthers.
Entertainment:
• GRAVITY’S BOX OFFICE SUCCESS IS OUT OF THIS WORLD & SNL’S SPACE-RELATED SKETCHES WERE “APPOLO-ING” (sorry, I had to): There’s really not much to say here, other than Gravity (starring Sandra Bullock and George Clooney) is unsurprisingly an enormous global box office success. In the two weeks since its release, the film has raked in more than $200 million worldwide. Also noteworthy: it inspired SNL to write not one, but two space-themed skits for its episode last weekend, which Bruce Willis hosted. Oh, yeah, and the internet went nuts with its space-related puns. You might even say that the internet universe-ally embraced the new trend of outer space humor at first, but now every “lunar-tic” with an astronomy pun thinks she’s a “comet-ian.” Really, the internet’s just become black hole of mediocre space jokes; it just creates an all-together unpleasant atmosphere. Not to worry, though. These silly internet trends tend to go out with a big bang almost as soon as they start. I promise that’s the end of it… I just had to get them out of my [solar] system. Okay, now I’m really done.
• ONE LESS KARDASHIAN TO KEEP UP WITH: Okay, this story is technically about the Jenners, not the Kardashians, but who really cares? It seems that Kris (aka the matriarch of the Kardashian Krew) recently announced her separation from her husband, Bruce Jenner (aka the guy who’s had more plastic surgery than Pamela Anderson and Joan Rivers put together). Some gossip columnists are speculating that the announcement was just a way for the family to draw in more viewers for their [inexplicably] popular reality show, Keeping Up With the Kardashians. And given what we know about momager Kris, I’d say it’s fair to assume that literally every newsworthy announcement that she makes for the rest of her life will be a ploy to increase viewership and boost ratings. So if you’re emotionally invested in this family’s wellbeing for whatever reason, I wouldn’t worry too much about the Jenners’ marital woes; I’m calling “publicity stunt” until the last “i” is dotted on the divorce papers.