Sometimes I can’t write my feelings because I have none. I lack basic control. When will I learn. When will I learn to feel my fear instead of let my fears feel me like your silhouette. It’s like it was handcrafted and handmade. It tried to consume me, it portrayed itself as sweet. To me it seems like it was made from the finest chocolate or the most pure sea. If I can stand up here and read, why can’t I shout. Why can’t I be that same little 6 year old the thought she was invincible. Am I transparent like my parents taught me to be? If you can survive a rollercoaster you can survive the surprises of life. It goes around once, it goes around, twice, it goes out there and four times until you finally break free. I wish life was as simple as social media can be, delete, comment, and post. Without all of the slander and trouble behind the scenes. I’m stuck between fighting and figuring. Figuring out my place in this world and fighting for my coins.I look to my past to try to eliminate negativity just so I can stare into my illuminated future. Some say death makes you think twice about what you really want in life, where you’ve been, and where you’re going. I’m packing up my fears and sending them on that rollercoaster to go around and around and around until they disappear.