Two roads divereged in a wood, and I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference.
– Robert Frost
At 23, it turns out that I did not know as much about life as I thought I once did. At some point in my college career, things started falling apart before my very eyes. I couldnt get a grasp on school work, my career, and I felt that my family just did not understand. So around my 23rd birthday, I decided to put my big girl boots on and run for the hills as far as adventure could take me. As Robert Frost would put it, I took the road less traveled. As a college student now entering her fifth year of school, working two jobs, maintaining a great relationship with my family and friends, I am learning that being an adult requires lots of accountability, responsibility, and self-love.
Now, this is not a narrative about how nobody likes you when you’re 23 (see what I did there?). This is not another promise that, at some point, things are going to be perfect. This is about how as young adult, I came to the realization that I am good enough, I am right where I want to be, but most importantly, I am still growing. However, in order to grow, I must first take the road less traveled.
As millennials, kidults, and the generation that invented “adulting,” we need to remind ourselves that we are products of our parents and not our parents’ generation. Life is not as easy as it was back in the 1990’s or prior. We have to work hard, we encounter sleepless nights, and I have heard many stories about people being homeless at the age of 23 and making a way for themselves by taking that road less traveled.
Your story is no different.
There are plenty of celebrities like J.K. Rowling, Oprah Winfrey, Jennifer Lopez, and others that have had to work countless hours to chase their dreams while having sleepless nights, heavy work loads, and doing a ton of networking to get their footing. But guess what? They did it. And you can do it too. Turning 23 does not mean that your life is ending because you are not where your peers are. It does not mean that you will never have that office that the CEO’s have. It does not mean that you will be single or lonely for the rest of your life. Remember you deserve love, you deserve the job, you deserve to give yourself a CHANCE.
After my 23rd birthday, I decided it is time to own up to my responsibilities and take accountability for the things that happen in my life. I logged on to my computer and made a list of empowering routines to get me into the swing of making the most out of my day. Every first of the month, I write down planned events on my big calendar. This ensures that I will know what I have planned for the month and what is to come every time I walk into my room. This calendar holds me accountable to every birthday, anniversary, holiday, and any payments that need to be made. Remember to make time for all of you important projects, time for yourself, and time with family and friends.
The next step I did was listen to my boss and finally get an agenda. (I actually grabbed two.) I got one cheaply made agenda that shows me the month ahead. In this agenda I place all work days as well as important dates like birthdays and reminders to keep me on my toes. In the second agenda, it lists day, week, and month assignments. This is for all of my school events and assignments. Being a full-time student was hard, but being a part time student who is working two jobs and in the middle of senior year is harder. It is imperative to stay on top of my assignments, club meetings, and scheduled group work times. Remind yourself like Spongebob reminded Sandy in the “Prehibernation Week” episode, “You’ve got to make time!” Remember, do not max yourself out. Be responsible with your time and leave room for study breaks, sleep, and most importantly FOOD.
The last step, as told by Tom and Donna on Parks and Recreation, is to “treat yo self.” As soon as you realize that life is not always going to be fun and filled with glitter, glam, and theme songs, you will truly appreciate treating yourself. Happiness is made for small moments to be savored in pictures or other significant moments of time spent enjoying yourself. You will not be happy your entire life. We spend over 90,000 hours of our life working and with seven to eight jobs before we are even 30. Remember, you deserve to be happy even when things are not exactly picture perfect.
The journey to accountability, responsibility, and self-love is going to be long. It will take trial and error. It will take everything you got. Even when you think you have everything figured out, you have to be willing to surrender all your planned inhibitions and make way for the unexpected things life will throw at you.
So with that, collegiettes, I ask… When life gives you lemons, will you make lemonade or throw those lemons away? You’re young. You will make mistakes. But take the road less traveled and shake up your routine. Always remember, it is not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years. Your time is now!
*All images courtesy of Pinterest